Is It Sinful to Want to Die?
00:00:00.000 | Is it sinful to desire death as an escape from the pain of this world and to escape
00:00:10.860 | the pain caused by our own sinfulness?
00:00:13.960 | Marissa, a listener to the podcast, is brave enough to ask it.
00:00:18.920 | Dear Pastor John, is it a sin to long to go home?
00:00:24.160 | I am a 31 year old and my life is ruined.
00:00:28.240 | I dread the rest of my life.
00:00:30.800 | Because of sin, I have lost everyone I love most, and I mean everyone.
00:00:36.320 | I feel like my very poor choices can't be redeemed while here on earth even though I
00:00:40.600 | have repented and confessed of my sins.
00:00:43.440 | I am terrified of what awaits me including having to remain single until I die because
00:00:48.360 | of an ensuing divorce that I don't want but did cause, and never having the blessing of
00:00:55.480 | forming a family.
00:00:57.680 | Is it a sin to want to go home and to be with Jesus?
00:01:01.720 | Your teachings are among the few things that keep me going.
00:01:04.880 | Pastor John, what would you say to Marissa?
00:01:08.920 | Marissa, let me give what I think is a clear biblical answer in general to your question
00:01:20.440 | and then circle around to your situation in particular with some, I pray, hopeful words.
00:01:30.640 | The biblical answer in general is that it is not a sin to long for heaven and for the
00:01:39.520 | presence of Christ with a sense of aching dismay over the sin and sorrows of this world
00:01:50.160 | and of our own lives.
00:01:52.440 | In fact, I would say that the more one knows of the real condition of this world and the
00:02:01.760 | more one grieves over the remaining corruption of our own hearts, the more natural it is
00:02:11.560 | to long for heaven and Christ.
00:02:14.280 | "Oh, that day when freed from sinning I shall see his lovely face, full arrayed in
00:02:20.560 | blood-washed linen, how I'll sing his sovereign grace.
00:02:25.920 | Come, come, my Lord, no longer tarry, bring thy promises to pass, for I know thy power
00:02:36.280 | will keep me till I'm home with thee at last."
00:02:41.240 | When Robert Robeson wrote that verse of "Come, Thou Fount" 150 years ago, he was not
00:02:49.600 | mentally unstable.
00:02:52.480 | He was full of the Holy Spirit, full of grace, full of wisdom, and full of longing, a longing
00:03:00.160 | that every saint tastes.
00:03:03.880 | That's what we long for, the day when we'd be free from sinning, the thing we want most
00:03:10.560 | to be free of in this life is dishonoring the Lord by our own sin.
00:03:15.240 | I mean, there are troubles in the world and there are pain in the world, but the most
00:03:19.280 | grievous thing is sin in our own soul in the world.
00:03:24.240 | So Paul says more than once, Philippians 1, 21, "My desire is to depart and be with
00:03:31.920 | Christ, for that is far better."
00:03:35.640 | And then he adds, "But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account.
00:03:41.480 | And convinced of this, I know that I will remain and continue with you all for your
00:03:47.560 | progress and joy in the faith."
00:03:49.480 | Or here he is again, 2 Corinthians 5, 6-9, "We are always of good courage.
00:03:57.800 | We know that while we are at home in the body, we are away from the Lord, for we walk by
00:04:03.040 | faith and not by sight.
00:04:04.720 | Yes, we are of good courage, and we would rather be away from the body and at home with
00:04:13.000 | the Lord."
00:04:14.000 | There it is, so clear.
00:04:15.600 | So whether we are away or at home, we make it our aim to please Him.
00:04:21.460 | So there's the biblical answer, Marissa, in general.
00:04:25.520 | To long to be at home with the Lord is not a sin.
00:04:30.120 | It is biblical, and it is healthy.
00:04:34.800 | Now the reason I say that's the general answer is that I can imagine a situation when it
00:04:42.840 | would be a sin to want to die and go to be with Jesus.
00:04:47.040 | Did you notice that in both Philippians 1 and 2 Corinthians 5, Paul knew that going
00:04:57.160 | home to be with Jesus was not yet God's will for him, and he took this from the hand
00:05:05.000 | of God with confidence that God would give him the strength and the grace for the life
00:05:13.420 | that was not his first choice, the life he was going to live as he remained on the earth.
00:05:20.080 | He said, "I know that I will remain and continue with you all," though my first choice would
00:05:26.000 | be to go and be with the Lord.
00:05:29.280 | And the key is found in 2 Corinthians 5, where he says, "We walk by faith and not by sight."
00:05:37.960 | And that brings me to your situation, Marissa.
00:05:41.760 | I want to encourage you that the ruin and dread that you see in front of you for the
00:05:50.840 | rest of your life is not in fact reality.
00:05:56.840 | At least it need not be.
00:06:00.600 | Here are your key phrases.
00:06:02.280 | They're very bleak.
00:06:04.040 | My life is ruined.
00:06:05.960 | I dread the rest of my life.
00:06:08.600 | I feel like my very poor choices can't be redeemed while on the earth.
00:06:13.920 | I am terrified of what awaits me.
00:06:18.000 | But Jesus would say, "When you say this, is this faith talking or sight talking?"
00:06:28.280 | We live by faith and not by sight.
00:06:29.720 | Is this faith talking or is this sight talking?
00:06:34.040 | Jesus is calling you, Marissa, to walk by faith and not by sight.
00:06:40.520 | I agree.
00:06:41.520 | From what you can see—see with the eyes of your head—from what you can see, the
00:06:48.360 | future looks hopeless, dreadful, terrifying, unredeemable.
00:06:53.080 | That's true.
00:06:54.080 | It does.
00:06:55.080 | But that's just not the way you have to live.
00:06:59.400 | We walk by faith, not by sight.
00:07:02.840 | And remember—this is so amazing—Paul said this about himself.
00:07:09.160 | He said this in the same breath as saying, "We would rather be away from the body and
00:07:16.240 | at home with the Lord."
00:07:17.480 | He wasn't blind.
00:07:18.900 | He knew that his future on earth would be full of sorrow, full of pain.
00:07:24.600 | Listen to this verse from Acts 20.23.
00:07:26.640 | "The Holy Spirit testifies to me in every city that imprisonment and afflictions await
00:07:35.800 | me."
00:07:36.800 | It wasn't a possibility for Paul.
00:07:38.920 | It was guaranteed.
00:07:40.600 | Pain is on the way, Paul.
00:07:42.080 | Till you have your head chopped off, it's on the way.
00:07:45.080 | He's not going to be ripped out of a life of comfort when he's martyred.
00:07:49.480 | He's going to be ripped out of a life of misery when he's martyred.
00:07:53.400 | He had no prospect of retirement with ease.
00:07:57.920 | He would be killed for Christ in the midst of afflictions, not the midst of comfort.
00:08:03.640 | That's what he saw with the eyes of the flesh.
00:08:08.400 | But with the eyes of faith, he saw miracles happening in him and through him.
00:08:14.120 | So he said, "Whether we are at home or away, we make it our aim to please Him."
00:08:22.080 | So here's a promise for you, Marissa.
00:08:24.720 | I believe God has given me this for you.
00:08:30.760 | Isaiah 58, verse 10, "If you pour yourself out for the hungry and satisfy the desire
00:08:38.600 | of the afflicted, then shall your light rise in the darkness and your gloom be as the noon
00:08:49.960 | day."
00:08:51.640 | The Lord will guide you, Marissa, continually, and satisfy your desire in scorched places
00:09:02.040 | and make your bones strong.
00:09:06.160 | And you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water whose waters do not fail.
00:09:16.320 | And then Isaiah 56, "I will give in my house and within my walls, I will give you a monument
00:09:27.200 | and a name better than sons and daughters.
00:09:31.560 | I will give you an everlasting name that shall not be cut off."
00:09:37.680 | So yes, Marissa, long for heaven, long for Christ, long for the day when we will sin
00:09:46.320 | no more, but trust His promises now, like Paul, as he faced a painful future and walked
00:09:56.840 | by faith, not by sight.
00:10:00.040 | God's promise for you is fruit in the midst of this sorrow.
00:10:05.360 | Thank you, Pastor John, and thank you for the question, Marissa.
00:10:09.400 | You know, we sometimes get emails from people struggling with depression, so it's really
00:10:12.720 | important to implore you.
00:10:14.400 | If you are struggling with ongoing depression, you need to bring this to the attention of
00:10:18.640 | your pastor, your doctor, and likely to a counselor, too.
00:10:24.000 | You will need the kind of in-person help that we cannot offer through this podcast.
00:10:28.440 | And if this is true of someone you know struggling with depression, too, you need to help them
00:10:31.720 | find help.
00:10:33.280 | As we talked about on this podcast, depression is complex, from low-grade depression to debilitating
00:10:38.600 | depression.
00:10:39.600 | It's all made complex by this marriage of our physical and spiritual lives together.
00:10:45.560 | But I can assure you, depression is not uncommon to Christians.
00:10:49.840 | If you struggle here, you're not alone, and you should not remain alone.
00:10:54.760 | Many Christians have struggled, and there is nothing to be ashamed of in speaking up
00:10:58.080 | and seeking out help.
00:10:59.880 | Well, Wednesday we return to take up one of the increasingly common questions faced by
00:11:05.040 | pastors, and that is when a gay couple is converted and regenerated, or even if one
00:11:09.800 | partner is, and he or she needs wisdom on how to proceed in thinking about their living
00:11:14.920 | arrangements, what should be done?
00:11:17.640 | What counsel should be offered by the pastor?
00:11:19.840 | This is not a hypothetical question, trust me.
00:11:22.360 | It's one we see more and more as pastors send in email questions to the inbox, and it's
00:11:27.280 | a question on the table on Wednesday.
00:11:29.440 | I'm your host Tony Renke, we'll see you then.
00:11:31.480 | [END]
00:11:31.980 | 1.
00:11:32.980 | What counsel should be offered by the pastor?
00:11:33.980 | 2.
00:11:34.980 | Should a gay couple be converted?
00:11:35.980 | 3.
00:11:36.980 | Should a pastor be a Christian?
00:11:37.980 | 4.
00:11:38.980 | Should a gay couple be a Christian?
00:11:39.980 | 5.