Why Gossip Destroys

00:00:00.000 | (upbeat music)

00:00:02.580 | - We are back with pastor and author Ray Ortlund,

00:00:08.080 | filling in for John Piper,

00:00:09.200 | who is on an extended writing leave right now,

00:00:11.520 | working on his next book,

00:00:12.680 | which I hope to tell you more about soon.

00:00:15.680 | Ray, in your Proverbs commentary, which is outstanding,

00:00:19.440 | and I commend it to every listener,

00:00:21.680 | in your Proverbs commentary, you write this, quote,

00:00:24.180 | "I have never seen adultery

00:00:26.360 | "send a whole church into meltdown.

00:00:29.620 | "Gossip, by contrast, is often perceived as a little sin,

00:00:34.120 | "but it destroys churches," end quote.

00:00:38.180 | Those are strong words.

00:00:39.840 | Explain the devastating power of gossip.

00:00:43.520 | - Yes, well, the Bible says that life and death

00:00:47.960 | are in the power of the tongue.

00:00:49.780 | What an amazing thing.

00:00:51.120 | The old saying, "Sticks and stones may break my bones,

00:00:53.660 | "but words will never harm me," that is not true.

00:00:56.640 | But how does that actually work?

00:00:58.360 | Life and death in the power of the tongue.

00:01:01.560 | As I've thought about it, Tony,

00:01:02.780 | it seems to me that we really experience reality

00:01:05.780 | within community.

00:01:07.400 | We figure out, as we go through life,

00:01:10.100 | we figure out who we are

00:01:12.040 | by the paying backs we get from other people.

00:01:15.000 | We go to the Bible for the big question,

00:01:18.080 | who's humanity?

00:01:20.080 | But when it comes to the smaller question, who am I,

00:01:23.740 | within that humanity,

00:01:26.400 | we have to notice how other people are responding to us

00:01:31.400 | and what they're saying to us,

00:01:33.300 | especially what they say to us about us.

00:01:36.120 | And the impressions that we pick up from other people

00:01:39.000 | by their words can be life-giving

00:01:42.640 | or that can be life-depleting.

00:01:45.440 | So in our churches, when we say to one another,

00:01:50.400 | especially when we say explicitly, "You don't matter,"

00:01:54.720 | and to the extent that you do matter,

00:01:57.160 | you're poisonous and you're radioactive

00:02:00.320 | and you're a leprous and so forth,

00:02:02.560 | those words and suggestions and impressions kill the soul.

00:02:07.560 | Because even if we are able to have enough strength within

00:02:12.000 | to disagree with that assessment,

00:02:13.600 | still we can't help but reel under those hammer blows.

00:02:17.040 | So to be cautious and restrained and careful

00:02:20.920 | in what we say to one another is so important,

00:02:22.720 | but words can also be life-giving.

00:02:25.320 | We can, by grace, in obedience to the Bible,

00:02:28.520 | to the glory of God, breathe life into one another.

00:02:33.200 | Romans 12, 10 says, "Outdo one another in showing honor."

00:02:37.320 | I mean, it's competitive.

00:02:38.520 | This is a win-win competition.

00:02:40.440 | So we have, for example, in our men's ministry

00:02:43.680 | on Tuesday nights, "Emmanuel Theology for Men,"

00:02:46.640 | part of what we do is we take time

00:02:48.640 | for what we call honor time.

00:02:50.760 | And it's not flattery, it's honest,

00:02:55.120 | but the scripture speaks of Christ in you,

00:02:58.320 | the hope of glory.

00:02:59.160 | So we open it up and guys will say,

00:03:01.880 | "Well, here's how I see Christ in you.

00:03:04.080 | "Last Tuesday, when I faced this challenge,

00:03:07.240 | "you stepped out of, at great inconvenience to yourself.

00:03:10.680 | "You helped me.

00:03:12.380 | "I saw Christ in you and I honor you for that."

00:03:15.120 | And typically, Tony, when I throw that open,

00:03:18.000 | immediately guys start speaking in it.

00:03:20.320 | And it's hard to shut it down.

00:03:22.280 | - Beautiful, thank you.

00:03:23.480 | And really quick before we go,

00:03:25.080 | flattery is a word we don't use a lot.

00:03:27.520 | What is flattery?

00:03:29.200 | - Well, flattery is telling a lie.

00:03:30.800 | Flattery is telling people something nice about them

00:03:34.640 | that just isn't true.

00:03:35.920 | But in a real Christian, Christ, the hope of glory,

00:03:40.440 | lives in that person.

00:03:41.400 | And if that person is trusting him and walking with him,

00:03:45.400 | the glory is not hard to read.

00:03:48.040 | It's wonderfully obvious.

00:03:50.120 | And we need to talk to each other about that.

00:03:53.080 | Because of course, our enemy, Satan, is accusing us

00:03:56.040 | and telling us that we don't count

00:03:58.360 | and we're failures and so forth.

00:04:00.320 | So this is one way we fight back to joy in the Lord.

00:04:05.320 | - Yes and amen, thank you.

00:04:07.120 | This is a glimpse into the kind of wise counsel

00:04:09.760 | you'll find in Ray's books.

00:04:11.600 | Specifically his commentary on the book of Proverbs,

00:04:13.840 | a book I featured in my top 10 favorite books of 2012.

00:04:17.000 | It's titled, "Proverbs, Wisdom That Works."

00:04:20.520 | And it's published by Crossway, be sure to check it out.

00:04:23.240 | Well, Easter is just days away.

00:04:25.080 | And I wanna finish out the week

00:04:26.200 | with a series of three sermon clips

00:04:28.200 | from John Piper's best Easter sermons.

00:04:31.320 | Each clip focuses on the implications of Easter.

00:04:33.960 | And Pastor John will help remind us

00:04:35.640 | how Easter breaks our sin, how it breaks our heartbreak,

00:04:39.680 | and how it breaks our mediocrity.

00:04:41.480 | That begins tomorrow.

00:04:42.840 | I'm your host, Tony Reinke.

00:04:43.760 | Thanks for listening to the Ask Pastor John podcast.

00:04:46.400 | (silence)

00:04:48.560 | (silence)

00:04:50.720 | (silence)

00:04:52.880 | [BLANK_AUDIO]

Why Gossip Destroys

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