How to Criticize Constructively Without Triggering Defensiveness
00:00:00.000 | If I criticize you publicly, you're likely to go into fight or flight mode and then you
00:00:05.220 | physically cannot hear what I'm saying.
00:00:07.080 | So once again, I'm wasting my breath.
00:00:09.160 | And so don't do that.
00:00:10.760 | And also use core with criticism, context, observation, result, next step.
00:00:15.520 | There's a world of difference between saying, "Oh Kim, you're just too stupid to do this
00:00:19.040 | job."
00:00:20.040 | Like that would be awful.
00:00:21.360 | Maybe it's better to say, you know, something else, say, you know, you lost credibility.
00:00:26.560 | In my case, that was the word that really got my attention.
00:00:30.040 | And my boss knew me well enough to know that that was the okay word to use with me, that
00:00:35.200 | it wasn't going to crush me, but it was going to get my attention.