back to index2022-05-15 Jaewon Yun Baptism Testimony
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My name is Chauan, and I'll be giving my testimony today. 00:00:13.240 |
So I was born in Illinois and moved around a couple times growing up. 00:00:17.920 |
And despite the moves, I was always surrounded by a loving family that provided for me and 00:00:25.040 |
We went to church on Sunday, and the importance of my relationship with Christ was always 00:00:30.480 |
But growing up, I didn't really enjoy going to church, doing devotionals or meeting up 00:00:36.840 |
Christianity felt like a chore, like a long to-do list. 00:00:40.840 |
And for the early parts of my life, my faith was really driven by fear, fear that I didn't 00:00:47.960 |
And if I didn't do enough stuff or I didn't like Christianity enough, I was pretty much 00:00:52.600 |
And things carried on like this until I moved to California in middle school. 00:00:57.040 |
My family joined a church that I found really fun. 00:00:59.880 |
I made lots of friends, and the desire to see them and socialize with them drove me 00:01:05.800 |
I was excited to go to church every Sunday, excited to help out at church events and do 00:01:09.920 |
all the things I thought a Christian was supposed to do. 00:01:12.940 |
I was excited by this change in heart and thought that I was finally acting like what 00:01:18.960 |
Unfortunately, I was under the impression that my acts alone made me a true Christian. 00:01:23.640 |
And even worse, my motivation to act like a Christian was driven by the fun I was having 00:01:28.880 |
And looking back, it's apparent I still didn't fully understand Christianity. 00:01:33.480 |
Fast forward to my sophomore year in high school, and I nearly died. 00:01:37.440 |
I was playing basketball for my high school and went into full cardiac arrest. 00:01:40.760 |
Thankfully, I was resuscitated with an AED and was rushed to the hospital where doctors 00:01:45.980 |
informed my family and myself that I'd actually been born with a congenital heart defect. 00:01:51.600 |
My heart hadn't developed correctly and doctors recommended I undergo open heart surgery. 00:01:56.720 |
Immediately I was filled with fear, fear of death, fear that surgery could go wrong. 00:02:01.600 |
And in the midst of my fear, I kept asking God, "What did I do to deserve this? 00:02:05.520 |
I've been doing everything right, or I thought I was doing everything right, so why did this 00:02:12.120 |
Obviously surgery went well because I'm here today. 00:02:15.240 |
But following that event, those questions still lingered. 00:02:17.920 |
I was thankful to God that he had brought me through such a serious event, but continued 00:02:22.080 |
to wonder what I did that could have caused it to happen. 00:02:25.920 |
I thought that after such a life-altering experience, my life would change. 00:02:29.360 |
I'd be imbibed with a will to do all the things I was supposed to do as a Christian. 00:02:35.440 |
When church wasn't fun anymore, my desire to serve dissipated and my desire to see Christ 00:02:42.720 |
Going into college, I carried the same questions and doubts. 00:02:44.920 |
I knew I wouldn't have survived if it weren't for God's sovereignty and blessing, but I 00:02:48.840 |
continued to believe that I had a part to play, that I was more significant than Christ. 00:02:54.360 |
It wasn't until I attended Grace Community Church at UCLA and Berean here that things 00:03:01.160 |
It was at these churches that I really learned my depravity. 00:03:04.320 |
No matter how hard I tried, no matter what I did, I could do nothing to get any closer 00:03:10.040 |
And thankfully, we have a God whose love never ceases, and I'm so grateful for the resurrection 00:03:16.520 |
I found a new comfort and hope in knowing that even in my sin, my life is in God's hands 00:03:23.520 |
Looking back, I realized that there was nothing I could have done to prevent what happened 00:03:26.760 |
to me, but God was using my struggle to show me how much I needed to depend on him. 00:03:32.360 |
Now I understand I'll never be a good Christian, that I need Christ because on my own, I am 00:03:38.520 |
I want to seek him because I am destitute if I were to try and do anything on my own. 00:03:42.400 |
My life is not my own, and because of that, it is absolutely necessary for me to give 00:03:45.960 |
my life to Christ and pursue him with everything that I have.