Dad’s Role in Homemaking

00:00:00.000 | A podcast listener named Zach writes in to ask this, "You have mentioned many times

00:00:10.080 | before the glorious role of a woman being a mother and a homemaker.

00:00:14.480 | Biblically speaking, though, what role does the husband have in homemaking and in caring

00:00:18.880 | for the children?

00:00:20.080 | What responsibility does he carry?"

00:00:24.360 | The husband bears the joyful, weighty responsibility of overseeing and leading the household so

00:00:36.320 | that each of the members flourishes to the fullest extent that God has planned.

00:00:43.120 | That's the simplest way to say it.

00:00:44.680 | A big, overarching statement, he's the overseeing, responsible one, which involves, he gives

00:00:55.600 | guidance for forming and formulating the moral vision of the family, what does it stand for,

00:01:01.600 | what are its ultimate goals, what's the tone of it, what's the spirit of the family, the

00:01:06.560 | structures of the family, the expectations of the family.

00:01:10.920 | His oversight involves primary responsibility for protection in the family, physically and

00:01:16.200 | morally and spiritually.

00:01:17.920 | It involves the primary responsibility for providing for the family.

00:01:22.480 | It involves a servant heart that leads by modeling rather than mere commanding.

00:01:29.460 | And it involves cultivating joy as the indomitable atmosphere because of the gospel and the sovereignty

00:01:37.800 | of God.

00:01:38.800 | Let me just tick off a few Bible verses for those observations.

00:01:45.120 | The husband is the head of the wife, Ephesians 5.

00:01:48.520 | That means he's leader, he gives guidance.

00:01:51.800 | That's what the head does to the other parts of the body.

00:01:53.880 | The eyes are in the head, the ears are in the head, the tongue and the voice is in the

00:01:57.960 | head, the brain is in the head.

00:01:59.360 | Of course, it doesn't mean the other parts of the body don't have their responsibility

00:02:03.880 | before God in their own way.

00:02:05.280 | It just means there's a unique role for the husband to lead.

00:02:10.520 | He's like the Savior.

00:02:11.920 | The husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is

00:02:15.880 | himself its Savior, which means, I take it, something like a protector, a deliverer.

00:02:22.440 | He guards the family from moral evil and physical evil.

00:02:27.640 | Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her, which means

00:02:32.160 | all this leadership and all this protection is sacrificial.

00:02:36.360 | He's not overbearing.

00:02:38.280 | It's uplifting.

00:02:39.640 | He leads like Christ.

00:02:42.200 | He remembers that Jesus said, you remember like the nations, they all like to be called

00:02:47.880 | benefactors and boast as great men.

00:02:50.320 | "It shall not be so among you who is greater, the one who sits at table or the one who serves.

00:02:57.200 | I am among you as one who serves."

00:02:59.840 | So he's telling dads, serve your kids, serve your wife.

00:03:04.400 | Let servant leadership mark your oversight of the home.

00:03:09.480 | And then this word of cherishing in Ephesians 5, 28, "In the same way, husbands should love

00:03:16.480 | their wives as their own bodies.

00:03:18.240 | He who loves his wife loves himself, for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes

00:03:22.960 | and cherishes it as Christ does the church."

00:03:26.260 | So there's a nourishing and a cherishing.

00:03:28.400 | The husband's a provider.

00:03:30.160 | He provides nourishment.

00:03:31.780 | He doesn't sit back and expect his wife to provide for the family.

00:03:35.640 | He takes primary responsibility and they work it out together, both of them using their

00:03:40.760 | gifts to provide for this family.

00:03:44.420 | And he does it, he does all this, Tony, with joy.

00:03:49.180 | He does it with joy.

00:03:51.120 | Deuteronomy 6, 6, "Let these words that I command you be on your heart.

00:04:00.000 | You shall teach them diligently to your children, shall talk of them when you sit in your house,

00:04:06.200 | when you walk by the way, when you lie down, when you rise up."

00:04:09.680 | That's the peculiar teaching function of dads.

00:04:13.720 | And the reason I say dads is because in Ephesians 6, it says, "Children, obey your parents in

00:04:20.920 | the Lord," and then moves in verse 4 to say, "Fathers, bring them up in the discipline

00:04:25.840 | and instruction of the Lord."

00:04:27.560 | And all of this instruction has at the center of it, "I spoke these things to you that my

00:04:33.080 | joy might be in you and that your joy might be full."

00:04:37.520 | So the father carries the burden of shaping the spirit and the instructions and the manpower

00:04:42.640 | of the family and shaping the child's character and the child's skills and the worldview of

00:04:48.680 | the child, all as a servant of the Lord with joy, because he's a little pastor.

00:04:54.360 | And Hebrews 13, 17 says, "Obey your leaders, submit to them, let them do this with joy,

00:05:03.000 | for that would be of no advantage to you if they did it with groaning."

00:05:08.000 | So dads who lead their kids and their wives with groaning are not serving them.

00:05:16.000 | We men are little pastors in our home.

00:05:20.080 | We have a little church there, and we're responsible to lead that little church, create the vision

00:05:26.000 | for that little church, create the spirit and the atmosphere for that church, and it's

00:05:29.320 | to be one of joy so that the kids realize that to be happy in God is really what life

00:05:35.760 | is about.

00:05:36.760 | Thank you, Pastor John, and thank you for listening to the podcast.

00:05:40.240 | So John Piper, what steals your joy?

00:05:43.440 | That's the question on the table for tomorrow's Ask Pastor John podcast.

00:05:47.400 | Until then, please continue to send us your email questions at askpastorjohn@desiringgod.org.

00:05:52.480 | I'm your host, Tony Reinke.

00:05:53.480 | Thanks for listening.

00:05:54.320 | [END]

00:05:54.820 | 1. What is the most important thing you can do to help others?

00:05:59.820 | [BLANK_AUDIO]

Dad’s Role in Homemaking

Chapters