Everyday Educator - Homeschooling with Down Syndrome and Tourette's: Real Mom Advice
00:00:00.000 | Welcome, friends, to this episode of the Everyday Educator podcast.
00:00:09.300 | I'm your host, Lisa Bailey, and I'm excited to spend some time with you today as we encourage
00:00:15.560 | one another, learn together, and ponder the delights and challenges that make homeschooling
00:00:22.120 | the adventure of a lifetime.
00:00:23.480 | Now, whether you're just considering this homeschooling possibility or deep into the
00:00:29.560 | daily delight of family learning, I believe you'll enjoy thinking along with us.
00:00:35.080 | But don't forget, although this online community is awesome, you'll find even more support in
00:00:42.660 | a local CC community.
00:00:44.540 | So go to classicalconversations.com and find a community near you today.
00:00:51.820 | Well, listeners, you have a treat in store for you.
00:00:55.200 | I want to introduce you to two friends of mine.
00:00:58.680 | We've got Jenny Tran.
00:01:00.040 | Jenny, welcome.
00:01:01.020 | Hey, everybody.
00:01:02.380 | And Jodi Priest.
00:01:04.760 | Jodi, thank you so much for making time for us today.
00:01:07.860 | My pleasure.
00:01:09.380 | I am glad to have you guys because I want to speak to a truth that we all know deeply.
00:01:18.060 | Homeschooling is the adventure of a lifetime, and it's something new every day.
00:01:24.160 | For every one of us, homeschooling turned out a little differently than we thought it was
00:01:31.300 | going to go.
00:01:32.020 | I sometimes look at my kids on a really hard day and think, I saw this going differently
00:01:39.180 | in my mind.
00:01:40.240 | You know?
00:01:41.000 | And when I started out, I had all these ideas of what a great teacher I was going
00:01:45.220 | to be and what perfect little students they were going to be and all the amazing things
00:01:49.420 | we would learn.
00:01:50.000 | And the only thing that has been true is all the amazing things that we would learn.
00:01:54.880 | Okay?
00:01:55.820 | And I was not perfect, and they were not perfect, but the Lord was still perfect, and He was
00:02:00.620 | perfect with us.
00:02:01.740 | And I have invited you ladies here because you have a unique perspective on I saw this going
00:02:10.620 | differently.
00:02:11.280 | And so I want us to introduce you and your family's homeschooling journey to my online
00:02:19.920 | friends today and let you be a blessing to them.
00:02:23.360 | So I want people to get a feel for who you are and why you have something to tell us.
00:02:31.620 | I want to ask, how long have you been homeschooling and why did your family begin homeschooling?
00:02:40.380 | Now look, ladies, there's no right answer.
00:02:42.940 | You don't get ejected or buzzed if you say something weird that is not homeschool perfect because we
00:02:51.880 | already established none of us are perfect.
00:02:53.960 | So I want to really know, why did you homeschool from the very beginning?
00:02:59.300 | Jodi, I'm going to let you start off.
00:03:01.360 | How long have you been homeschooling and why did your family begin this journey?
00:03:05.800 | We have been homeschooling, this is our 11th year.
00:03:10.460 | We have never done anything other than CC.
00:03:14.480 | We started CC when my oldest was four and he is now 15.
00:03:20.360 | So why?
00:03:23.540 | I tell people why, because the Lord knew that we needed to homeschool before I knew that we
00:03:30.520 | needed to homeschool.
00:03:31.360 | So when we started homeschooling, I have five children.
00:03:37.260 | We just had two and it was my two boys and we just felt like the Lord kind of put a homeschool
00:03:45.120 | family in our path with teenagers.
00:03:47.100 | Oh, yes.
00:03:48.420 | And we were like, we don't know what they're doing different, but we want children.
00:03:53.240 | I want some of that.
00:03:54.480 | So we just kind of blindly jumped in.
00:03:57.380 | We were like, well, we went to a CC informational and we said, well, that sounds good.
00:04:02.940 | Um, and then we kind of wrestled with, uh, but our kids will never ride the school bus
00:04:08.540 | or they'll never learn to stand in line.
00:04:10.600 | My girls.
00:04:12.400 | Okay.
00:04:12.720 | I found out that one of my children didn't want to homeschool anymore and I, I didn't freak
00:04:17.280 | out, but I asked more questions.
00:04:18.360 | I discovered it's because she wanted a lunchbox.
00:04:20.660 | Oh, yeah.
00:04:21.500 | Well, we wrestled through all of that and the rest is history.
00:04:25.080 | Um, so 11 years and we homeschooled because really the Lord knew that that's what our family
00:04:31.700 | needed in years to come.
00:04:33.600 | And yeah, you knew before you did.
00:04:35.860 | That's really cool.
00:04:36.720 | I think it's really cool that your family has done CC the whole time.
00:04:40.960 | Our family began as homeschoolers, but I did not know about CC until my oldest.
00:04:46.760 | Well, we didn't get involved.
00:04:48.160 | I found out about it a year ahead of when we joined, but, um, my oldest was fifth grade.
00:04:54.120 | And so she didn't have those early.
00:04:56.140 | She didn't have as much foundations as her sister had.
00:04:59.700 | So that's cool.
00:05:00.340 | All right, Jenny, how about you?
00:05:01.920 | Um, how long have you homeschooled and why did you and David elect homeschooling as your
00:05:07.860 | education method?
00:05:09.060 | Yeah, well, we have, we just finished our sixth year of homeschooling because my oldest is only
00:05:15.900 | 10.
00:05:16.340 | So we started right from the get go and we've only done CC as well, uh, because David started
00:05:23.720 | working for CC when banks was three.
00:05:26.340 | So it was right before he would start foundation.
00:05:28.760 | So that's kind of that story.
00:05:31.720 | But Judy, it's interesting.
00:05:33.280 | Your story is a lot like my story.
00:05:34.840 | David introduced me to a homeschooling family when we were dating and seeing how their family
00:05:40.640 | interacted with one another.
00:05:42.420 | And just, I knew something was different about them.
00:05:45.280 | I said, that's what I want.
00:05:46.520 | And for some reason I, I just associated that with, oh, it's because they homeschool.
00:05:51.000 | Isn't that fun?
00:05:53.260 | But that's kind of what introduced me.
00:05:55.220 | But we really also enjoyed, or we loved the idea of the flexibility of schedule and David
00:06:02.600 | and I both love to travel and we knew we wanted to.
00:06:04.960 | So knowing that we wouldn't have to take our kids out of school to go travel, that we weren't
00:06:09.840 | dictated by someone else's schedule for them really appealed to us as well.
00:06:15.360 | And of course, we wanted to be in charge of training their hearts in the way that the
00:06:21.220 | Lord has.
00:06:21.920 | And we didn't see that going well in any other school system.
00:06:25.580 | So that's kind of why we decided.
00:06:28.020 | Yeah.
00:06:29.140 | I love that.
00:06:30.240 | The whole idea of being really, truly able to shepherd and care for your child's heart as
00:06:37.220 | well as their mind.
00:06:38.280 | Jodi, you mentioned that you guys chose homeschooling.
00:06:43.460 | You really feel like it was because the Lord knew that you were going to need it before
00:06:47.560 | you did.
00:06:48.100 | What did you mean by that?
00:06:49.260 | Well, when we started homeschooling, we just had our two boys and then we got pregnant with
00:06:54.600 | our third kiddo and she was diagnosed with trisomy 21, Down syndrome.
00:07:01.460 | And that was during my pregnancy.
00:07:05.080 | So the Cliff Notes story, since we don't have all the time in the world, is that homeschooling
00:07:13.080 | homeschooling really fit our family in those younger years when she had some medical issues
00:07:19.840 | in infancy.
00:07:20.740 | It just gave us the flexibility to kind of focus on her, but still stay up with school.
00:07:28.320 | And it allowed us to, she was diagnosed with leukemia when she was two.
00:07:36.980 | And we were able to kind of pack up.
00:07:40.520 | We left Moore County.
00:07:42.420 | We're here in Southern Pines.
00:07:44.960 | And we packed up our family and went to Cincinnati, where she received treatment in Cincinnati.
00:07:52.260 | And the beautiful thing of the whole story is that we left our CC group here for a little
00:07:59.580 | while and kind of picked up with a CC group in Cincinnati.
00:08:04.180 | So fast forward to today and she's fine and just homeschooling works for our family.
00:08:11.960 | And the only thing I can say is that the Lord knew we were going to get Eden and he knew that
00:08:18.340 | this was the best match.
00:08:19.640 | And so he just led me there before I even knew that it was going to be a thing.
00:08:27.440 | What a beautiful thing that the Lord allowed you guys to establish your homeschool rhythm
00:08:32.880 | before Eden joined your homeschool rhythm.
00:08:38.020 | And so you are already a little established.
00:08:40.440 | Is homeschooling, I imagine that homeschooling is a great fit for her and blending her needs
00:08:55.180 | and her interest into the rhythm, the family rhythm of learning.
00:09:01.360 | I mean, I cannot imagine anything else.
00:09:06.680 | She is, she has now done CC since she was probably four or five as well.
00:09:14.340 | I mean, she's excelling in all the things.
00:09:17.840 | I just, I can't imagine anything else because I have the privilege and flexibility of tailoring
00:09:27.940 | her weekly work.
00:09:29.560 | Um, I mean, to the point that last year, I started a new curriculum middle of the year for her reading.
00:09:36.820 | Um, and so CC just provides that stable foundation.
00:09:40.900 | And then all of the pieces, parts that I supplement with, I mean, it's kind of trial and error.
00:09:46.880 | What works with her choices.
00:09:48.540 | That's really cool.
00:09:51.840 | That's really cool.
00:09:53.020 | Um, Jenny, you said you have how many kids?
00:09:58.020 | I have five as well.
00:09:59.940 | Five kids as well.
00:10:01.780 | So does homeschooling work for all five of your kids and does it work for all five of them
00:10:07.300 | for the same reasons?
00:10:08.840 | Yeah, I think it definitely works for all five of them.
00:10:13.220 | Um, and they all have their individual needs for sure.
00:10:16.760 | Um, I just had my fifth.
00:10:19.080 | So, I mean, technically he's still being homeschooled as well right now.
00:10:23.620 | Right, right.
00:10:24.620 | Just turned four months old, but I, I know that it's going to do well for him as well.
00:10:30.160 | My oldest, um, he has a Tourette's syndrome.
00:10:34.820 | It's a mild form of it, but we didn't know that actually until he was already homeschooling.
00:10:39.020 | And it's been a real big blessing to have not only CC, but the flexibility at home to,
00:10:44.700 | first of all, get to know who he is and how he learns.
00:10:49.160 | To change things on a daily basis for him, because I've found that as he's gotten older,
00:10:57.120 | his needs have definitely changed.
00:10:59.820 | And what worked even six months ago is not going to work now.
00:11:03.840 | And I'm able to have those conversations with him and what he needs.
00:11:08.300 | Um, even if it's just, you know, an exercise break, or if he wants more freedom, uh, with,
00:11:13.880 | with his, uh, Tourette's diagnosis, he also, there's usually a secondary underlying
00:11:19.060 | condition.
00:11:19.580 | So, um, we've got OCD on, on top of that.
00:11:22.980 | Um, so it's been really nice for him.
00:11:27.120 | Um, and then, um, also the one, the baby I just had little Callum, he also has a trisomy
00:11:34.200 | 21 diagnosis and I did not find that out until he was born.
00:11:38.260 | And Jody has been my saving grace.
00:11:41.000 | I've asked her so many questions and I really look forward to being able to homeschool with
00:11:46.340 | him, uh, all throughout as well.
00:11:48.980 | I'm learning a lot from Jody.
00:11:50.120 | It's nice to have a big sister, you know, uh, it's nice to have somebody who has walked the
00:11:57.220 | path, even if it's just a little bit ahead of you.
00:12:00.700 | Um, it gives you some, not just hope that the path is walkable, but it gives you community
00:12:08.700 | along the path.
00:12:09.820 | And I really did want to talk about, um, neurodivergence.
00:12:15.980 | You know, there are a lot of families.
00:12:17.580 | I spent lots of years on what I called the practicum circuit.
00:12:21.660 | Like I went and talked to people in all different, um, states.
00:12:26.760 | I did practicums everywhere.
00:12:28.520 | And I always had parents who would come up and say, this sounds so, and they would have
00:12:34.960 | this longing in their eyes.
00:12:36.120 | This sounds so wonderful.
00:12:37.960 | I really want our family to be able to do this, but I have a special needs child.
00:12:44.080 | It's what they used to say years and years ago.
00:12:46.560 | And I'm not sure that this would be good for my student.
00:12:50.960 | And then one year I had a student in my challenge B class who had Tourette's, um, and I had kids
00:12:58.620 | who were diagnosed with OCD.
00:13:00.880 | And I was able to say after that, um, I believe that this is a great avenue for your family, but
00:13:11.560 | I wanted you guys to speak to it.
00:13:14.820 | So for listeners who have tuned in and they're thinking, I'm not even sure what neurodivergence
00:13:24.000 | is, Jodi, would you give us a layman's label, a layman's term for that?
00:13:29.920 | Yeah.
00:13:31.200 | I mean, I feel like, I mean, we can all look up in the dictionary.
00:13:34.680 | What is neurodivergence?
00:13:35.880 | Exactly.
00:13:36.180 | Everybody can use mother Google and Google that, right?
00:13:39.340 | In my conversations with families, I'm a challenge A tutor.
00:13:43.380 | I've kind of been around a while.
00:13:45.380 | Um, yeah, I always tell people when we used to use the word special needs and they would
00:13:52.160 | say, I have a special needs child.
00:13:53.860 | Um, since having Eden, I always just push back and say, who doesn't have special needs?
00:14:01.620 | We all have special learning abilities.
00:14:06.400 | Um, so just because they're, they have the label and you don't, we're all still,
00:14:13.220 | in the same pot of learning and we all learn differently.
00:14:17.880 | Um, so if neurodivergent by definition is just a child that learns differently from what
00:14:26.220 | is typical, I guess.
00:14:27.620 | Yes.
00:14:28.300 | If we use five common topics, where do we land on what is typical?
00:14:32.740 | Um, what you can compare, compare to, you know, I mean, what most people are doing at a certain
00:14:40.760 | age, but yeah.
00:14:41.920 | Wow.
00:14:42.580 | I do feel like half of the battle of being a mom of a quote unquote special needs or neurodivergent
00:14:51.420 | child, half the battle is getting myself out of the way.
00:14:55.480 | Um, I feel like I hold her back so much because in my mind, when I look at the CC curriculum,
00:15:04.680 | I say, well, I don't know that she'll ever be able to enter essentials.
00:15:09.300 | I don't know that she'll be able to do this.
00:15:12.940 | Um, but what, but I need to focus on what she can do.
00:15:17.420 | And this year she was able to grasp the concept of a map and places she was able to, I mean,
00:15:25.640 | she is just rocking presentations.
00:15:27.860 | Isn't that wonderful?
00:15:30.740 | So I mean,
00:15:31.720 | For any child to rock presentations, because I had one that was so shy.
00:15:34.840 | She did not talk above a whisper for a long time.
00:15:38.060 | So for any child to rock presentations, I'm like a fan.
00:15:41.580 | Yeah.
00:15:42.080 | I mean, do we always understand what she says?
00:15:45.060 | No, but the beauty is her classmates are translators now.
00:15:49.600 | So they're getting something out of it.
00:15:51.960 | I mean, it's just a beautiful, um, it's just a beautiful vision of what I feel like the Lord
00:15:59.540 | meant for community, um, that we see with her.
00:16:03.360 | And, you know, so back to your question, what is neurodivergent?
00:16:07.660 | I mean, I, I really would love it if we just did away with it all together and said,
00:16:12.220 | you know, here's her learning style.
00:16:14.260 | Here's your learning style.
00:16:15.780 | This is how she processes what she hears and says, how she experiences the world, you know,
00:16:23.260 | um, she needs to experience the world more quietly.
00:16:26.580 | I, one of my daughters, when she was really young, she could not deal with loud noises.
00:16:32.280 | You know, she did not want to experience the world at high volume.
00:16:36.100 | And I mean, that wasn't typical for a two year old, but it was the way she experienced the world.
00:16:43.000 | And so we made adjustments.
00:16:45.100 | Yeah.
00:16:46.500 | I love the, what, that way of looking at that.
00:16:50.080 | Um, what does this mean?
00:16:53.540 | What is this?
00:16:54.300 | Cause I understand that neurodivergence in and of itself is not a diagnosis.
00:17:00.480 | It's a description of how children, um, process what they experience and how they experience
00:17:08.540 | the world.
00:17:09.220 | Um, what does that array, whether it is down syndrome or Tourette's or OCD, um, what does having a
00:17:20.380 | child who is dealing with some of those challenges?
00:17:23.400 | What does that mean for education at your house, Jenny?
00:17:27.660 | Yeah, I'll be honest.
00:17:30.620 | I, I mean, I don't do anything differently.
00:17:34.560 | I mean, maybe it's just because it's what I know, uh, cause I look at each one of my children
00:17:39.060 | and I say, okay, what, what do you need banks and how do you learn best?
00:17:43.200 | Okay, Lila, how do you learn best?
00:17:44.920 | And, um, I, I take my children individually when I'm thinking about curriculum choices,
00:17:51.320 | um, outside of CC reading and things like that.
00:17:54.480 | Um, how do I need to schedule their day?
00:17:57.460 | Um, I don't, I don't look at banks any different just because he has that label, I guess.
00:18:04.820 | It's just what I do for all my children because I really want to, I want them to succeed and
00:18:10.840 | I want my house to be calm, honestly, too.
00:18:13.280 | And it's what works best for us.
00:18:15.960 | So it really, I don't, I don't see any different than what I talk to my friends.
00:18:19.240 | It's not based on a label.
00:18:20.160 | I, what I hear you saying is it's not so much based on a label as it is based on knowing your
00:18:27.280 | child and all of your children and what will be the most comfortable way for them to learn.
00:18:34.420 | You know, what, how can they most, um, happily and effectively take in information and how
00:18:43.540 | can you build a community that intersects the needs of all of your children and what, what
00:18:51.260 | will work label or not.
00:18:54.160 | Right.
00:18:55.060 | And it might mean I need to spend a little extra time with banks on certain things as well.
00:18:59.020 | So I, I know that that's had a big adjustment in our year this year, uh, with banks entering
00:19:05.840 | essentials and he, his, his personality, you just got to love him.
00:19:11.660 | Um, he likes things a particular way and he follows the rules that very type a type personality
00:19:17.560 | and he wants to get it all right, right away.
00:19:20.560 | Yes.
00:19:21.040 | Yes.
00:19:21.880 | And he has to be right.
00:19:23.580 | And it takes him a little bit longer just to understand certain things or why we have
00:19:28.940 | to do things a certain way.
00:19:30.940 | Right.
00:19:31.600 | Especially with all that essentials work.
00:19:33.680 | So it was a trying year in that regard.
00:19:36.980 | So I did have to spend a little bit of extra time with him.
00:19:40.240 | Uh, but again, that's the beauty of homeschooling and the flexibility is I could let the girls kind
00:19:46.220 | of go do their thing more independently and I found curriculums that helped with that while
00:19:51.920 | I focused a little bit more on banks.
00:19:53.460 | Um, I catered our day kind of around, I need to spend, you know, maybe an hour of essentials
00:19:59.040 | with banks cause it's going to take him that long to understand the concepts.
00:20:02.840 | Um, right.
00:20:03.760 | Yeah.
00:20:04.900 | So we just constantly reevaluate as well.
00:20:08.620 | Cause you know, one, what, what worked last fall did not work this spring, especially
00:20:14.080 | after having a baby.
00:20:15.100 | So, um, yeah, constantly reevaluating.
00:20:19.080 | Okay.
00:20:19.940 | So that's, that is actually, that's the kind of nugget that I think our listeners are hanging
00:20:25.980 | on the edge of their seat waiting for, because we think we, you know, I'm a real type A make
00:20:33.940 | a list and make a plan.
00:20:35.580 | And so I would make the plan in September fully believing that in April it would still work
00:20:41.680 | and then, you know, be confounded when my children did not see it that way, or, you know, life
00:20:48.320 | happened.
00:20:48.880 | So to hear you say, okay, you got to get over yourself if you're that kind of planner and
00:20:55.000 | you just need to know that you're going to be, um, you are going to be riding the wave
00:21:02.480 | of your children's changing needs and be okay with that.
00:21:07.420 | That's a great way to put it.
00:21:09.040 | That's a lovely way.
00:21:10.840 | So we all just need to become better surfers.
00:21:13.300 | Okay.
00:21:13.620 | I'm processing that.
00:21:15.140 | And that's probably my disorder that I have trouble with change.
00:21:19.440 | Jodi, what about you?
00:21:21.320 | What does it mean for education in your home, um, to have Eden have some unique learning challenges
00:21:30.540 | or ways that she learns?
00:21:33.360 | Oh, goodness.
00:21:35.940 | Uh, I mean, like Jenny, we definitely are, we just hold it with an open hand.
00:21:41.380 | Like it worked last month.
00:21:43.160 | Um, let's keep trying.
00:21:45.080 | I mean, I threw a whole lot of things out the window in January of this year and started something
00:21:51.900 | new.
00:21:52.220 | So, um, I'm always just kind of open to what works.
00:21:56.100 | And I, I feel like with Down syndrome, you know, there's no one expert on how they learn
00:22:01.360 | because they are individual humans and they all learn differently.
00:22:04.380 | Um, but I think the thing that having a different style learner in our house, um, from our typical,
00:22:15.020 | more independent learners, um, has just really caused us to slow down.
00:22:21.240 | Um, it's just really, it's real easy now that we have some teenagers in the mix to just go,
00:22:28.020 | go, go, go, go.
00:22:28.880 | Um, and our house, you, I, we can't, like Jenny said, sometimes I had to spend extra time with
00:22:35.560 | banks.
00:22:35.920 | Sometimes we have to spend extra time, um, or change the day up.
00:22:41.420 | Or, I mean, it's just kind of a, um, an anchor for us, um, which is kind of nice.
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00:23:48.780 | Outside of the classroom, they also have what they call the house system, and that provides
00:23:54.040 | a vibrant student-led community where students make lifelong friendships and participate in house
00:24:00.180 | competitions and experience deep community all the way from freshman year to graduation.
00:24:06.260 | Lastly, something I found absolutely fascinating was that they have a classical emphasis.
00:24:11.780 | So they have a great books course, which is required for every single degree in undergrad.
00:24:17.420 | And in that course, they focus on the history of human ideas through a biblical worldview,
00:24:23.020 | and that allows the students to develop as readers, writers, and researchers as they grow as committed
00:24:29.880 | followers of Christ.
00:24:31.120 | If you want to find out more about Judson College, visit judsoncollege.com forward slash distinctives.
00:24:37.700 | Let's get back to the show.
00:24:39.080 | It actually, I was going to say, it actually sounds lovely to say that we are going to pursue
00:24:50.900 | restful learning, or we sometimes need to change the atmosphere so that it's not frenetic,
00:24:59.000 | that it's not go, go, go, go, go, get her done, probably doesn't really minister to many of us.
00:25:10.820 | We're just used to living that way.
00:25:13.140 | So we might all benefit from a slower, easier pace, a more relational pace, a more tailored
00:25:22.260 | to our current needs and learning culture pace, a better rhythm.
00:25:27.340 | And I can say, Jodi, that we found the same thing.
00:25:30.580 | We have to slow down a lot.
00:25:32.180 | And it was harder for me to slow down than it is for my kids, I think.
00:25:36.880 | I think they need to do all the things and we have to be done by lunch or something.
00:25:41.340 | And no, we don't.
00:25:42.440 | Who says we have to be done by a certain time or we have to do a certain subject every day?
00:25:47.900 | We've done so many different things to change the day up.
00:25:52.380 | We even one semester, maybe even just six weeks, I just did one subject a day, but we did it
00:25:58.560 | for like the whole week's worth.
00:25:59.920 | And that worked for that season.
00:26:01.860 | And then we had to move on from that.
00:26:03.780 | But slowing down was a real big eye opener for me as well, because I didn't want to.
00:26:09.900 | It was more me than them.
00:26:12.340 | And I had to really humble myself in that to say, take a breath, Jenny.
00:26:16.560 | They're okay.
00:26:17.540 | They're right where they need to be.
00:26:19.080 | Just because that kid's somewhere else, you can't compare what our family does to someone
00:26:24.320 | else's family.
00:26:25.240 | And that was a big learning curve for me.
00:26:29.180 | Yeah, it is very wise that there are sometimes lessons that we as parents have to learn before
00:26:37.160 | we're very good at shepherding the education of our children.
00:26:41.340 | I have so many things that I want to ask you guys, but know that I only have a little bit
00:26:48.980 | of time.
00:26:49.260 | So maybe what I'll do is have you back another time and we will explore some other things.
00:26:53.520 | I suspect that there are some parents, though, who would love to pick your brain.
00:27:01.400 | So, Jodi, you said that you guys found out that Eden, when you were still pregnant, that
00:27:09.660 | Eden was going to be born with Down syndrome.
00:27:12.160 | Jodi, you and Jenny, you didn't know until Collin was born.
00:27:18.120 | What would you tell parents about seeking help when they become concerned about their child's
00:27:29.680 | development or about things not being typical?
00:27:36.040 | Well, my answer that I have developed by trial and error and that I hold fast to now is I
00:27:48.720 | don't seek help.
00:27:49.660 | I have learned that the world is very quick to label these children or just give them a medicine
00:28:02.200 | medicine or, you know, it's a therapy or something to get over fill in the blank.
00:28:09.720 | Yeah.
00:28:10.120 | So really, I mean, this may sound just kind of rainbows and butterflies, but it's really just
00:28:17.500 | a matter of just seeking the Lord.
00:28:20.320 | And the Lord has been faithful to dump things into my lap that have been life giving to her.
00:28:30.620 | And for full transparency, we in last year in January adopted another little girl with
00:28:38.460 | Down syndrome from South America who does not speak any English and educating her.
00:28:45.800 | I mean, I have no person to ask anything because it's such a unique story.
00:28:54.500 | And really, the Lord has just been faithful to lead.
00:28:58.320 | So really just seeking the Lord for that is all the advice I can give because I feel like
00:29:04.940 | before I was wise in this area, I would seek help.
00:29:09.560 | And it just left me in a defeated place, just a defeated and overwhelmed place that didn't
00:29:17.060 | have the answers that helped.
00:29:19.160 | I can imagine getting so many opinions and so many recommendations that at times were probably
00:29:29.140 | very divergent.
00:29:30.280 | And so how do you choose?
00:29:31.700 | You don't.
00:29:32.380 | Who's right?
00:29:33.900 | Who's right?
00:29:34.900 | So, Jenny, for you, you said that you guys didn't realize that banks had some of the processing
00:29:43.060 | issues right away.
00:29:45.880 | So when what led you to think there may be something different that we need to address?
00:29:52.920 | How did you recognize that there were some things you might need to work around or work with?
00:29:58.580 | Yeah.
00:29:59.720 | Well, we noticed some of his tics.
00:30:02.280 | That's a symptom or something that children with Tourette's have.
00:30:06.540 | He was moving his arms a certain way or making noises with his mouth.
00:30:11.420 | And at first, he's a kid.
00:30:13.600 | He's a kid.
00:30:14.460 | But it started getting, I guess, kind of more consistent.
00:30:17.560 | And I remember there was one day it took him like two and a half minutes to get one sentence
00:30:24.060 | out because he had to make certain movements with his head and noises with his mouth.
00:30:29.100 | And it was causing him not to be able to, what's the word I'm looking for, guys, to communicate
00:30:37.860 | with us.
00:30:38.340 | Yeah.
00:30:38.960 | Yeah.
00:30:39.140 | And so I videoed him.
00:30:42.040 | I asked him a question and I told him I was going to video him and send it to our pediatrician
00:30:45.880 | at the time.
00:30:46.520 | And I just videoed and I said, what do you think?
00:30:51.440 | And she said, well, if you want to go see a neurologist, that's your choice.
00:30:56.420 | He was very, our pediatrician at the time was very much, you know, you're the mom.
00:31:00.920 | Right.
00:31:01.920 | So I just decided to go.
00:31:02.740 | Follow your cues.
00:31:03.580 | Yeah.
00:31:04.440 | Because I knew I would not, I did not want to medicate him for anything.
00:31:07.740 | I knew it wasn't that bad.
00:31:08.700 | But I think for me, I just wanted to know, is this something I need to be aware of and
00:31:15.160 | that I can research on how I can help him better?
00:31:17.460 | Because I don't want this to hinder him as he starts school to be able to communicate
00:31:22.760 | with people.
00:31:24.000 | Sure.
00:31:24.400 | I mean, is there something that you could know that would help them?
00:31:28.160 | Not, is there something you could do about him?
00:31:30.940 | Is there something you could do for him?
00:31:32.880 | Right.
00:31:33.300 | And that goes back to wanting to know my child.
00:31:35.260 | And even when the neurologist just said, yes, he's got Tourette's.
00:31:40.340 | And I said, well, what does that mean?
00:31:41.720 | How do you come to that label?
00:31:44.160 | And, you know, listening to her doing my own research, I came to know that, okay, yeah,
00:31:50.340 | we have a mild form of that.
00:31:51.780 | It's, it's not what they portray on TV.
00:31:54.440 | It looks a lot different.
00:31:55.620 | And to keep my mind open about who he is, because I will be very honest, when he got that diagnosis,
00:32:02.500 | it was, you know, it hits you here as a mom, like, oh no, is he going to struggle?
00:32:06.900 | How am I going to parent him?
00:32:08.820 | The same thing when we found out that Callum has Down syndrome.
00:32:13.540 | I, in the hospital, I was a wreck.
00:32:15.960 | I just, not because he had that specific thing, but it was, God, am I really prepared for this?
00:32:21.280 | How am I going to parent?
00:32:24.100 | I don't know what I'm doing.
00:32:25.560 | I already have four.
00:32:26.260 | Like, are you, are you sure, me?
00:32:27.800 | Like, and that's what I actually texted Jodi as soon as I could get myself together.
00:32:33.380 | I said, Jodi, here's where we are.
00:32:35.020 | I know you've been here before.
00:32:36.160 | I need help.
00:32:37.520 | So in that way, I did ask for lots of help, but I also, as I get the different opinions
00:32:44.840 | on Tourette's or Down syndrome, I take it as a grain of salt and I go to the Lord about it.
00:32:52.180 | And I say, okay, I know my child best.
00:32:55.820 | What do you want me to do with that, God?
00:32:59.160 | And it's, it's been hard, but we've also seen the beauty in that the Lord provides what you need,
00:33:07.060 | even when you don't know what you need.
00:33:08.840 | Kind of like what Jodi was saying earlier about she homeschooled and didn't realize how much it was
00:33:13.200 | going to, how much she needed it.
00:33:15.120 | Man, while we were in the hospital with Callum, the Lord just showed me who he was in so many
00:33:21.700 | different ways.
00:33:22.440 | Cause I felt I was the one that was scared and unsure, but God was like, I knew this was
00:33:29.140 | going to, you know, Callum was going to be your child from the get-go.
00:33:31.940 | I know Banks was going to have this forever.
00:33:33.940 | He, this is his personality.
00:33:35.140 | This is the way he learns.
00:33:36.200 | And you're just learning this and it's okay.
00:33:38.700 | Cause I had this in my plan all along and it took a while.
00:33:42.660 | I was not great those first few weeks, but I'm the kind of person that I like all the information,
00:33:49.400 | but I'm going to make my own decision when you give me that information.
00:33:53.500 | I want you to talk just for a minute about the power of community, the power of community.
00:34:05.660 | Um, and not just for children who have special learning plans for all of us.
00:34:14.860 | What does community look like for your family?
00:34:18.280 | And what are the blessings of community for all of our families?
00:34:24.000 | So what do you think, Jodi?
00:34:25.600 | Oh man, that is, I feel like different seasons of life, community has looked different, but
00:34:35.640 | it's always been a vital backbone to our homeschool.
00:34:41.080 | There was a season of life where community held us up.
00:34:44.640 | Um, and thankfully we are celebrating because community now is a place where it's not necessarily
00:34:53.440 | holding us up.
00:34:54.420 | It is, we're thriving, um, communities thriving.
00:34:58.880 | It is, um, I was telling, I don't, I don't remember who I was telling, but I feel like if
00:35:08.380 | we, if you kind of flip around, like what community is doing for us and say, well, what is our family
00:35:13.540 | doing for community?
00:35:14.720 | Um, I feel like Eden and our new daughter, Emily, they're just presence in community.
00:35:23.040 | community is just such a life-giving thing.
00:35:26.080 | Um, we are not insulated in our comings and goings all week.
00:35:30.460 | Um, and the children that they've kind of, the do community around, uh, they treat them differently
00:35:40.000 | than kids outside of our CC community.
00:35:44.060 | Um, and it's just, it's just a really great thing because there's just a silent teaching
00:35:50.260 | that's happening, um, just to love people where they are, despite like any physical differences
00:35:57.200 | or, um, things like that.
00:35:59.520 | So, Hey everybody, we want to interrupt the show to let you know that national memory master
00:36:06.160 | and national commencement are moving to the classical conversations, family cruise in 2026.
00:36:14.560 | That's right.
00:36:15.540 | This cruise isn't just about celebrating CC graduates and memory masters.
00:36:19.920 | It's about all CC families.
00:36:22.700 | You can connect with CC leaders and families at all stages in their journey and turn education
00:36:28.720 | into a memorable family adventure as you explore the Bahamas aboard Royal Caribbean's freedom
00:36:35.660 | of the seas.
00:36:36.320 | Check out our landing page to find out more at classicalconversations.com forward slash cruise
00:36:43.760 | dash 2026.
00:36:45.980 | Let's get back to the show.
00:36:47.320 | We hope to see you there.
00:36:48.400 | So what about you, Jenny?
00:36:50.280 | How has community been a blessing to you and to all your children, to your whole family?
00:36:55.420 | Yeah, uh, we love community and we have, you know, several different, I guess, types of community.
00:37:02.440 | Um, but I'll just, I give like a lot of real life experiences.
00:37:07.680 | Um, for instance, I agree with Jodi.
00:37:11.500 | Communities can look different in different seasons of life, but that doesn't mean that's
00:37:15.960 | the only season that they can speak to you.
00:37:18.040 | Um, after we had Callum in January and we found out about his diagnosis and, uh, we spent
00:37:24.800 | time in the NICU, um, and we were delivering an hour away from where we live.
00:37:30.120 | And so, um, I of course got discharged, but I had to stay close by in Raleigh to Callum because
00:37:37.040 | he was still in the NICU and I was having to go back and forth.
00:37:40.160 | Well, our community, we used to live in Raleigh.
00:37:42.600 | We've been here in Whispering Pines now for five years, but.
00:37:45.940 | Our church community from Raleigh was all around us.
00:37:50.540 | We stayed with our old marriage mentors who were at, in our wedding, or I did.
00:37:55.380 | David had to come home to be with the other four kids.
00:37:57.980 | So our community here in Whispering Pines was taking care of David and my kids by bringing
00:38:03.020 | them meals, helping David with babysitting the kids while he worked.
00:38:07.900 | Um, they were, you know, my friends were texting me and encouraging me and praying for me while
00:38:13.540 | I was in Raleigh, our old church in Raleigh was somehow, I had two nurses that went to
00:38:19.300 | Summit, uh, our old church.
00:38:21.300 | Um, I had a, a friend that I actually mentored her.
00:38:25.240 | She came to visit me in the hospital.
00:38:27.800 | Um, it, it was just really interesting to see how God took those two communities during
00:38:32.440 | that season and brought them together to help us.
00:38:34.660 | And, you know, we hadn't been back to Raleigh really in five years, but all these people came
00:38:39.420 | out of the woodworks to say, let me bring you a Starbucks gift card.
00:38:42.780 | Let me come get you lunch today.
00:38:44.800 | Um, so it's just, I don't know where we would be without community, honestly.
00:38:50.900 | Yeah.
00:38:51.340 | Yeah.
00:38:52.200 | I love that people come out of the woodwork and there, there is no limit to the love that
00:38:59.240 | the Lord wants to show us.
00:39:01.720 | And it is a beautiful thing when, when that love flows through his people and that we're
00:39:07.940 | able to minister to one another.
00:39:09.900 | I love that, um, I appreciate you guys sharing your experience and your wisdom.
00:39:16.740 | I feel like you have given us lots of things to think about and lots of wisdom, um, to build
00:39:24.120 | our home community on, um, no matter how many children we have, no matter what the learning
00:39:33.000 | needs or the processing abilities of our children are, you guys have given us some really great
00:39:39.420 | principles, uh, upon which to, to construct a good family learning community.
00:39:46.300 | And I appreciate y'all being here today.
00:39:48.240 | I want to give you one more chance.
00:39:49.560 | I want you to tell me your family's favorite thing to do together.
00:39:56.080 | What is it that your family loves to do all together?
00:40:02.260 | Cause maybe we all need a new idea for the summer.
00:40:04.920 | Okay.
00:40:05.520 | All right, Jenny, you're laughing like you have something in mind.
00:40:09.160 | Tell us, what is it that you and David like to do with your kids all together?
00:40:13.140 | Oh, uh, I mean, we, we, we just love, we love upbeat music.
00:40:18.680 | And so we love to sometimes just blast the music and have silly dance parties with them.
00:40:23.960 | Oh, how fun.
00:40:25.020 | Most of them love it.
00:40:26.560 | I will say Banks does not, it's not the biggest dancer, but he participates in his own way.
00:40:32.000 | And we had to learn to be okay with that.
00:40:34.260 | Yes.
00:40:35.000 | Yes.
00:40:36.400 | But some, I found that sometimes when your house is just too, feels too serious or the
00:40:41.900 | joy, you feel the joy has just sunk away.
00:40:44.140 | We just, all right, let's go dance it out.
00:40:46.120 | Um, so that's, that's one thing we really love.
00:40:49.440 | That's awesome.
00:40:50.240 | Yeah.
00:40:51.220 | Well, we also love to travel to new places together.
00:40:53.420 | So we've been able to go with David on a lot of work trips, which has been fun.
00:40:57.060 | Oh, that's so nice.
00:40:58.680 | You mentioned you love to travel.
00:41:00.220 | I think that's fun.
00:41:01.120 | Well, um, I know some people who might pay big money to see a video of David dancing.
00:41:06.180 | So, uh, you can hook me up later.
00:41:08.780 | Okay.
00:41:09.200 | Um, Jodi, what about you?
00:41:11.540 | What does your family love to do all together?
00:41:14.080 | Oh, I, I think I would say we like to go camping.
00:41:19.960 | Um, we are, we're campers and, um, I think our kids led the way on that.
00:41:26.880 | And my husband and I kind of got on board like, well, I guess we'll enjoy this.
00:41:30.940 | Um, but yeah, that's, I mean, we don't get to do it as much.
00:41:36.000 | As we'd like anymore, but, um, but it's, yeah, it's a great thing.
00:41:41.140 | Something for everyone to love out there in the woods.
00:41:43.980 | Yes.
00:41:44.600 | Yep.
00:41:45.340 | Okay.
00:41:45.720 | Well, that's a good thing.
00:41:46.880 | All right.
00:41:47.240 | Um, ladies, thank you so much.
00:41:49.320 | I appreciate you sharing your homes and your families with us today.
00:41:53.540 | Listeners.
00:41:54.260 | I know you have been blessed.
00:41:55.680 | You can let us know what a blessing this has been, um, by dropping us a line.
00:42:01.640 | Um, thanks for joining us and we'll see you next time.
00:42:04.600 | Bye-bye.
00:42:05.820 | Bye-bye.
00:42:05.820 | Bye-bye.
00:42:10.720 | Bye-bye.
00:42:11.560 | Bye-bye.