How Should We Dress for Church?

00:00:00.000 | (upbeat music)

00:00:02.580 | Pastor John, hello.

00:00:05.460 | We are recording this episode

00:00:07.500 | in the midst of a pandemic shutdown

00:00:08.960 | of our cities and our states,

00:00:10.180 | recording right now from home.

00:00:12.100 | And neither of us have gathered

00:00:13.740 | with our local churches for weeks now,

00:00:15.460 | and this episode is scheduled to launch

00:00:17.500 | sometime in early May.

00:00:19.000 | So it's a question about church dress codes,

00:00:21.140 | and neither of us know, by the time this episode launches,

00:00:24.440 | if we will still be quarantined

00:00:25.900 | or if we'll be meeting in person on Sundays

00:00:28.280 | with our churches.

00:00:29.380 | In any case, churches in this country

00:00:31.140 | will eventually reunite.

00:00:33.040 | We trust the Lord in that.

00:00:34.760 | And to prep for that meeting,

00:00:36.260 | we have a question from John,

00:00:38.100 | a listener in South Carolina, who writes this.

00:00:40.980 | Pastor John, hello.

00:00:42.020 | When we join in corporate worship

00:00:44.220 | and gather in God's house,

00:00:45.260 | should we dress in our best clothes?

00:00:47.940 | I tend to say yes.

00:00:49.180 | The world seems to dominate our choices

00:00:50.880 | in too many ways in our worship,

00:00:52.740 | in our music, building styles, flippancy, et cetera.

00:00:56.320 | Under the old covenant,

00:00:57.260 | Moses was clear that priests should wear holy garments

00:01:00.460 | that were elaborate.

00:01:01.740 | That's Exodus 28, verse four.

00:01:04.180 | In entering the presence of God through Christ,

00:01:06.380 | it seems to me the modern church

00:01:07.700 | has settled for casual Fridays,

00:01:10.580 | a dress code from the corporate world.

00:01:13.000 | Do you know of any scriptures in the New Testament

00:01:15.020 | that address appropriate attire for a church?

00:01:18.160 | Pastor John, what would you say to John?

00:01:20.700 | Yes, but maybe not in the way you think.

00:01:23.500 | (both laughing)

00:01:26.180 | But let me set it up.

00:01:27.500 | Whether you dress to kill on Sunday morning,

00:01:31.620 | or dress to kill those who dress to kill,

00:01:35.660 | or whether you close your eyes earnestly

00:01:39.100 | while singing the doxology,

00:01:41.100 | or casually sip your latte while singing "Holy, Holy, Holy,"

00:01:46.100 | or whether you sit with respectful posture

00:01:50.520 | or slouch with indifference,

00:01:52.940 | or whether you keep your hands to yourself

00:01:55.220 | or rub the back of your boyfriend's neck

00:01:58.160 | while the pastor pours out his heart,

00:02:00.820 | or whether you disdain a shabby visitor

00:02:03.660 | or rejoice that they are welcome,

00:02:06.220 | all these things and many more are shaped and guided

00:02:11.220 | by your vision of what God is like in this service

00:02:16.240 | and what is at stake here,

00:02:19.540 | what you believe should be happening here.

00:02:23.780 | So let me lift up some biblical descriptions

00:02:28.220 | of God and his ways,

00:02:30.980 | which I think if they came to us with appropriate weight

00:02:35.540 | and wonder and joy and awe,

00:02:38.560 | we would discern more clearly how to dress

00:02:42.180 | and act in worship services, corporate worship.

00:02:47.180 | In other words, I think tinkering externally

00:02:50.940 | with how we dress does not come close

00:02:55.460 | to the heart of the matter that plagues the church today.

00:02:59.320 | The problems are far deeper than that.

00:03:03.380 | Certain kinds of behaviors and clothing

00:03:06.980 | are simply symptomatic of views of God and worship

00:03:11.980 | and ourselves that are at best lopsided

00:03:17.660 | or worse, unbiblical.

00:03:19.220 | So here they are.

00:03:21.300 | Number one, let our demeanor and dress reflect

00:03:26.260 | the transcendence and imminence of God,

00:03:30.060 | the majesty and the intimacy of God.

00:03:34.260 | Isaiah 57, 15, "Thus says the one who is high and lifted up,

00:03:39.260 | "who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy.

00:03:44.700 | "I dwell in a high and holy place,

00:03:49.700 | "and also with him who is of a contrite and lowly spirit."

00:03:54.820 | So I would ask, has the swing, say in the last 40 years,

00:04:00.820 | from formality in church to casualness in church

00:04:06.020 | captured a mature balance

00:04:10.020 | between transcendence and imminence?

00:04:12.860 | I think the answer to that is no, by the way.

00:04:14.540 | (Rhett laughs)

00:04:15.380 | And I mean, that's not fair,

00:04:16.820 | because I don't mean to paint with a big brush.

00:04:19.380 | Many churches, I would say, no.

00:04:21.540 | And I would just ask everyone who's listening

00:04:23.740 | to consider for themselves and their church,

00:04:26.220 | especially pastors, what about my church?

00:04:28.880 | Don't point your finger at others.

00:04:30.740 | Number two, let our demeanor and dress

00:04:34.900 | reflect the severity and kindness of God.

00:04:40.500 | Romans 11, 22, "Behold the kindness

00:04:44.260 | "and the severity of God."

00:04:47.620 | Severity toward those who have fallen,

00:04:50.820 | but God's kindness to you,

00:04:53.060 | provided you continue in his kindness,

00:04:55.900 | otherwise you too will be cut off.

00:04:58.980 | Now, God is not to be trifled with.

00:05:03.020 | He is not mocked.

00:05:05.740 | He is more severe and more kind than we can imagine.

00:05:10.740 | And there is a demeanor that flows

00:05:15.180 | from a sober experience of the mingling

00:05:18.580 | of these two realities,

00:05:20.460 | especially as we come into worship face-to-face,

00:05:24.060 | corporately, with this God.

00:05:27.080 | Number three, let our demeanor and dress

00:05:30.540 | be shaped by the glad gratefulness

00:05:35.120 | and serious reverence that come

00:05:39.140 | from the firmness of the kingdom

00:05:42.180 | and the fire of God's holiness.

00:05:45.820 | Hebrews 12, 28, "Let us be grateful

00:05:50.340 | "for receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken,

00:05:53.380 | "and let us offer to God acceptable worship

00:05:57.600 | "with reverence and awe,

00:06:00.820 | "for our God is a consuming fire."

00:06:05.820 | Acceptable worship will have a strong taste

00:06:10.360 | of reverence and awe.

00:06:13.040 | This is missing in many churches,

00:06:16.440 | and it affects not only the kind of clothing we wear,

00:06:20.760 | but the kind of souls we become.

00:06:23.960 | Number four, let our demeanor and dress

00:06:27.240 | reflect the biblical call to self-humbling

00:06:31.260 | rather than self-exaltation.

00:06:33.300 | Luke 18, 14, "Everyone who exalts himself

00:06:36.580 | "will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself

00:06:39.140 | "will be exalted."

00:06:40.580 | Now that's, of course, to be true of all Christians

00:06:42.620 | all the time, everywhere, but I'm arguing

00:06:45.660 | especially in corporate worship.

00:06:48.540 | Let every man and every woman think

00:06:52.540 | as he or she dresses Sunday morning.

00:06:56.380 | Something like this.

00:06:57.920 | I want to be totally non-distracting

00:07:02.400 | in my presence in worship today.

00:07:05.480 | I will not, I will not, as a man or a woman,

00:07:09.680 | try to stand out, not by style, not by expense,

00:07:14.560 | not by cleverness, not by offensiveness,

00:07:18.320 | not by sexiness, by what I reveal

00:07:21.080 | or how tight my clothing is,

00:07:23.240 | or how elegant or trendy my hair is,

00:07:26.760 | or how perfectly coordinated my colors are,

00:07:29.840 | or how free from taboos I am, or how solemn I am.

00:07:34.840 | My aim will be to dress and act in a way

00:07:39.160 | that simply does not attract or distract

00:07:44.160 | from what should be happening here.

00:07:48.720 | That's my interpretation of humble yourself.

00:07:52.920 | Get out of the way, dress to be undistracting.

00:07:57.920 | Number five, let our demeanor and dress

00:08:02.360 | reflect the joyful readiness to embrace all comers

00:08:07.360 | who may not be able to dress the way we would like to

00:08:12.240 | or like them to.

00:08:13.680 | James chapter two hits this pretty head on.

00:08:17.720 | My brothers, show no partiality as you hold the faith

00:08:21.480 | of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory.

00:08:23.880 | For if a man wearing a gold ring and fine clothing

00:08:27.820 | comes into your assembly and a poor man

00:08:30.520 | with shabby clothing also comes in

00:08:33.320 | and you pay attention to the one who wears fine clothing

00:08:37.240 | and say, you sit here in a good place

00:08:39.760 | while you say to the poor man, you stand over there

00:08:43.520 | or sit at my feet, have you not made distinctions

00:08:47.720 | among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts?

00:08:51.760 | Now, the alternative to this judging partiality

00:08:56.760 | is not something as superficial

00:09:01.120 | as everybody dressing in shabby clothes.

00:09:04.420 | That's ridiculous.

00:09:05.960 | This is a matter of the heart.

00:09:09.160 | It may be that the richest woman in the church

00:09:13.440 | dressed in very nice clothing,

00:09:15.820 | the richest woman in the church will be the quickest

00:09:19.820 | to embrace the poor person in shabby clothes

00:09:23.300 | who walks in on Sunday morning.

00:09:25.560 | Her heart may be totally right

00:09:28.040 | while the cool dressed down click

00:09:31.820 | don't pay any attention at all.

00:09:33.480 | It's not a matter of the clothing at that point.

00:09:36.780 | It's a matter of the heart.

00:09:38.860 | And finally, number six, let our demeanor and dress

00:09:42.320 | reflect the biblical truth that many things in life,

00:09:47.120 | including worship life, are decided not by what is commanded

00:09:52.080 | or forbidden biblically,

00:09:53.900 | but what is fitting and proper biblically.

00:09:57.960 | When the father in the parable of the prodigal son

00:10:03.120 | tried to entreat his elder son to join the feast,

00:10:07.680 | he didn't say, get in here, it's my command

00:10:10.640 | for goodness sakes, I'm your dad.

00:10:13.040 | He said, son, this is verse 32 of Luke 15,

00:10:18.040 | "It is fitting to celebrate and be glad

00:10:22.280 | for this your brother was dead and is alive.

00:10:25.600 | He was lost and is found."

00:10:27.800 | If the only criterion you are using right now

00:10:32.080 | in deciding how you act and dress in corporate worship

00:10:35.460 | is, well, I believe God is gracious

00:10:38.200 | and accept us just as we are.

00:10:40.560 | You have a hold of something wonderful, you do,

00:10:43.880 | and it's lopsided and needs supplementing with more truth.

00:10:48.880 | Let me illustrate, and I'll close with this illustration.

00:10:52.640 | If you're married to the most wonderful woman,

00:10:56.240 | the most patient, most kind, most forgiving,

00:10:58.480 | most gracious woman in the world,

00:11:00.600 | who loves you as you are, accepts you as you are,

00:11:06.120 | and you show up on your 25th wedding anniversary celebration

00:11:10.720 | at a nice restaurant where she has gone ahead of you

00:11:13.440 | 'cause you've been at work,

00:11:14.960 | and she has made some nice plans for you,

00:11:18.840 | and you show up at this restaurant in T-shirt

00:11:22.080 | and tennis shorts 'cause you just come straight

00:11:24.380 | from the tennis court, she will accept you,

00:11:28.240 | she will love you, that's the kind of woman she is,

00:11:31.600 | and you will have not done well

00:11:35.040 | because that was unfitting.

00:11:38.200 | So I end where I began.

00:11:41.200 | All these things and many more are shaped and guided

00:11:46.200 | by your vision, our vision, of what God is like,

00:11:51.540 | and what you believe should be happening in this service.

00:11:56.480 | What is fitting before this God?

00:12:00.840 | - Amen, yeah, it's a question of fittingness.

00:12:03.320 | Thank you, John, for the question.

00:12:04.800 | Thank you, Pastor John, for the response,

00:12:06.920 | and thank you for listening.

00:12:07.920 | If you haven't done so, get our new episodes

00:12:09.880 | as we release them by subscribing to Ask Pastor John

00:12:12.840 | in your favorite podcast app in Spotify,

00:12:15.040 | or by subscribing to DG's YouTube channel.

00:12:17.640 | And to find all 1,500 of our past episodes,

00:12:21.160 | or to submit a question of your own,

00:12:22.600 | go online to desiringgod.org/askpastorjohn.

00:12:27.600 | Well, is the Calvinist-Arminian debate overblown?

00:12:31.240 | Does it really matter?

00:12:32.640 | Will it make any difference in our lives anyways?

00:12:35.640 | That is the question, up next time on Monday.

00:12:38.360 | I'm Tony Reinhke, we'll see you then.

00:12:40.200 | (upbeat music)

00:12:42.800 | (upbeat music)

00:12:45.400 | [BLANK_AUDIO]

How Should We Dress for Church?

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