Is God Fed Up with Me?
00:00:00.000 | [Music]
00:00:06.000 | Kayla writes in to ask this, "Pastor John, my soul is in great distress.
00:00:11.000 | After living in disobedience and under conviction for a few months,
00:00:14.000 | my deep desire I once had for fellowship with God is now gone.
00:00:18.000 | I used to be so in love with Christ.
00:00:21.000 | Hebrews 4 makes clear that sin hardens the heart, and I found it to be true.
00:00:25.000 | My question is, does this mean I have fallen away from the faith?
00:00:28.000 | My biggest fear is being destined for destruction, as Scripture says of Judas and others.
00:00:33.000 | Please help."
00:00:34.000 | Pastor John, what would you say to Kayla?
00:00:37.000 | I'm really thankful that Kayla is in distress.
00:00:43.000 | I'm thankful that she's fearful because how much worse would it be if Kayla were careless right now,
00:00:53.000 | if she were cavalier, if she were just blowing off this coldness and saying,
00:00:59.000 | "Devil, my care, I don't give a rip how I feel. It doesn't matter anymore.
00:01:03.000 | I tried that Christianity stuff. I'm done with it."
00:01:06.000 | That would be infinitely worse than fear and distress.
00:01:11.000 | The text that gives her fear but also gives hope is Hebrews 12 about Esau.
00:01:23.000 | "See to it," this is chapter 12, verse 15 from Hebrews,
00:01:27.000 | "See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God,
00:01:32.000 | that no one is sexually immoral or unholy like Esau."
00:01:37.000 | And maybe that's what she's done is fallen into a season of sexual sin.
00:01:43.000 | I mean, those are the kinds of things that make us feel hopeless about our possible salvation.
00:01:51.000 | "Don't be like Esau who sold his birthright for a single meal,"
00:01:55.000 | just threw away his spiritual privileges for an immediate gratification.
00:02:02.000 | "For you know that afterwards when he desired to inherit a blessing, he was rejected.
00:02:10.000 | For he found no place," that's the literal translation,
00:02:14.000 | "no place to repent, no occasion to repent, no repentance, though he sought it with tears."
00:02:22.000 | It's possible to backslide so long and so deeply that there's no return.
00:02:31.000 | Now, is that what's happened with you?
00:02:37.000 | It doesn't sound like it because Esau was rejected,
00:02:45.000 | not because he repented and wouldn't be accepted, but because he couldn't repent.
00:02:54.000 | That's what it says. He found no repentance.
00:02:58.000 | He found no place to repent, though he sought it with tears.
00:03:02.000 | He had become so callous, so hard, so distant,
00:03:06.000 | that there was no ability for him to see how horrible his sin is,
00:03:12.000 | to see how great the mercy is, to feel horrible and broken about his sin
00:03:19.000 | and turn away from it to the living God.
00:03:22.000 | He couldn't do it. It was all a sham as far as he was concerned.
00:03:27.000 | And the question then, Kayla, is do you see the horror of sin?
00:03:31.000 | That's a gift of God. That's an element of repentance.
00:03:34.000 | Do you see the gospel held out freely?
00:03:38.000 | So here's what Jesus said about the unforgivable sin,
00:03:44.000 | because my guess is that's lurking right there in the background of your concern,
00:03:48.000 | is have I committed the unforgivable sin?
00:03:51.000 | Here's what Jesus says in Matthew 12, 31.
00:03:53.000 | And listen to these initial words, because they are meant to give you hope.
00:03:57.000 | "Therefore I tell you, every sin and blasphemy will be forgiven."
00:04:05.000 | People, that's amazing.
00:04:07.000 | Every sin and blasphemy will be forgiven.
00:04:11.000 | And then he says, "But the blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven."
00:04:16.000 | Now, what is that?
00:04:19.000 | They were calling him the devil.
00:04:21.000 | They were saying that he casts out demons by the power of Beelzebul,
00:04:26.000 | and therefore they had turned the world on its head.
00:04:29.000 | They were seeing Jesus as demonic,
00:04:32.000 | and they were no longer able to see Jesus as who he really was.
00:04:38.000 | Have you gotten to the demonic point that Jesus is the devil,
00:04:43.000 | and you now can pronounce judgment on him?
00:04:48.000 | Or can you repent?
00:04:51.000 | And if you can repent, there's hope.
00:04:53.000 | And here's one of the most beautiful statements of hope that I know of.
00:04:58.000 | It says from 1 Timothy 1:15, where Paul is talking to you, Kayla.
00:05:02.000 | "The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance
00:05:06.000 | that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners,
00:05:09.000 | of whom I am the foremost.
00:05:14.000 | But I received mercy for this reason,
00:05:19.000 | that in me as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience
00:05:25.000 | as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life."
00:05:32.000 | So here's what he's saying.
00:05:34.000 | I was a blasphemer, a murderer.
00:05:38.000 | He says this in Acts 9.
00:05:40.000 | A murderer, a persecutor, a hater.
00:05:43.000 | And let this sink in.
00:05:46.000 | Paul was a Pharisee.
00:05:48.000 | He believed in demons.
00:05:50.000 | There is no reason to believe that Paul disagreed with the Pharisees in the Gospels
00:05:54.000 | who said Jesus was casting out demons by the power of demons.
00:05:59.000 | Paul was a blasphemer.
00:06:03.000 | He had walked right up to the edge, evidently, of blaspheming the Holy Spirit.
00:06:11.000 | And God chose him, saved him.
00:06:15.000 | Why?
00:06:16.000 | Paul says it's so that in the 21st century,
00:06:21.000 | John Piper, on a podcast, could say to Kayla,
00:06:26.000 | "Christ is that patient with you."
00:06:29.000 | That's why he saved Paul.
00:06:31.000 | He saved Paul for Kayla.
00:06:33.000 | I really believe Kayla should read 1 Timothy 1, 15-16 that way.
00:06:40.000 | Paul wants to be read as giving encouragement to those who feel like the patience of God has run out.
00:06:49.000 | So, in the name of Jesus and with the authority of Paul, Kayla,
00:06:53.000 | I think I can say to you, I do say to you,
00:06:56.000 | Turn and come to Jesus, and you will find his arms outstretched to a prodigal daughter.
00:07:07.000 | Beautiful. Thank you, Pastor John.
00:07:09.000 | And thank you, Kayla, for the frank and honest question.
00:07:12.000 | Like Kayla, if you have a question for Pastor John, please email it in to us at askpastorjohn@desiringgod.org.
00:07:18.000 | You can visit us online at desiringgod.org to find thousands of free books, articles, sermons, and other resources from John Piper, all free of charge.
00:07:26.000 | I'm your host, Tony Reinke. We'll see you tomorrow.
00:07:29.000 | [END]
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