Good evening everyone. We're going to go ahead and get started with Bible study. So why don't we take a couple of minutes to just prepare our hearts. Father, we thank you so much for giving us this opportunity to meet, to worship you, to study your word. We thank you so much for Christ and Christ's example for us as we live on this earth.

We pray as we study through your word, being reminded of Christ's humility and submission, that we ultimately submit to you and to your authority. We're reminded that Christ is our savior, but we pray that we would remember that Christ is also our Lord. So we pray that we would submit to this Lordship and that we center our lives around giving you worship and honor and glory.

We pray for tonight you would give us strength. We just pray for this time of praise that it would fill our hearts with gratitude and an ultimate reverence and respect for you. So we love you and pray all this in your name. Amen. Why don't we all stand for a time of praise?

We fall down. We fall down. We lay our crowns at the feet of Jesus. The greatness of mercy and love at the feet of Jesus. We fall down. We fall down. We lay our crowns at the feet of Jesus. The greatness of mercy and love at the feet of Jesus.

♪ And we cry holy, holy, holy ♪ And we cry holy, holy, holy ♪ And we cry holy, holy, holy ♪ Is the lamb See, we fall down. ♪ We fall down ♪ We lay our crowns ♪ At the feet of Jesus ♪ The greatness of mercy and love ♪ At the feet of Jesus ♪ And we cry holy, holy, holy ♪ And we cry holy, holy, holy ♪ And we cry holy, holy, holy ♪ Is the lamb (gentle music) ♪ Oh, kneel me down again ♪ Here at your feet ♪ Show me how much you love ♪ Humility ♪ Oh, spirit be the star ♪ That leads me to ♪ The humble heart of love ♪ I see in you ♪ 'Cause you are the God of the broken ♪ The friends of the weak ♪ You wash the feet of the weary ♪ Embrace the ones in need ♪ I want to be like you, Jesus ♪ To have this heart in me ♪ You are the God of the humble heart ♪ God of the humble ♪ You are the humble king ♪ Oh, kneel me down again ♪ Here at your feet ♪ Show me how much you love ♪ Humility ♪ Oh, spirit be the star ♪ That leads me to ♪ The humble heart of love ♪ I see in you ♪ 'Cause you are the God of the broken ♪ The friends of the weak ♪ You wash the feet of the weary ♪ Embrace the ones in need ♪ I want to be like you, Jesus ♪ To have this heart in me ♪ You are the God of the humble ♪ You are the humble king ♪ You are the God of the humble ♪ You are the humble king ♪ - You may be seated.

- All right, let me go ahead and open this up in a word of prayer, and then we'll get into this passage, which I'm sure you guys have all kinds of thoughts on. All right, so let me pray for us, and I'll read for us 1 Peter 3 afterward.

Lord, we're very thankful that you are so kind and that you've provided for us a means and an access to God. We thank you, Lord, that you didn't treat us fairly, but you treated us with compassion and mercy, and in turn, Lord, you're calling us to do the same toward those in our lives.

I pray that as we study today's passage, for some, this may be a lot more painful and sensitive than it is to others, but regardless of where we are, just in regard to relating and interacting with this passage, would you speak, and would you minister, would you guide us and lead our time of both discussion and learning for all of these things we pray in Jesus' name.

I'm gonna read verses one, and I'm gonna read through to verse nine, just for context's sake. In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands, so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior.

Your adornment must not be merely external, braiding the hair and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses, but let it be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. For in this way, in former times, the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves being submissive to their own husbands, just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, and you have become her children, if you do what is right, without being frightened by any fear.

You husbands, in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman, and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. To sum up all of chapter two, verses 13 and on, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit, not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead, for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.

So questions one and two are pretty standard, and you guys are probably familiar with this. Question number three is something that I feel is important, if you guys do have time to address. What are the objections that rise up in and around you when you think through the ramifications of these verses?

And in chapter two, he tells us to abstain from fleshly lusts, right? We're no longer living in our former ignorance of those fleshly lusts that we inherited from our forefathers. So as you're looking at this text, which is very insensitive to our culture, what are the knee-jerk reactions that rise up in your heart and for sure in the hearts of those around you?

And this isn't something that you wanna avoid asking, we wanna know how to answer them appropriately, right? And so I'll bring those up, and then we'll gather together at 8.20, and then we'll do a time of teaching, okay? to assist with their training. 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All right, let me pray for us, and we'll get the wrap-up portion started. Lord, give us wisdom and insight into your truths. So that in the case of exceptions, that we would know how wisely to apply these verses into our lives. But for the day-to-day, the mundane, where it's more of our convenience and our pride that keeps us from obeying these words, I pray that you would cause us to be broken, and cause us to be tender-hearted before you.

And so, Lord, over the next few minutes, would you really feed us, and help us to really glean much from this passage. In Jesus' name we pray. All right, as I do weekly, I'm just providing for you a little bit more of an adjusted outline. So I included chapter 213.

I took out some of the verses in the middle, but I included that part, because that's the primary command. Okay, so the purple bowl, there's only that one. That's the major imperative, the submit yourselves. Okay, for whose sake? For the Lord's sake. So as worship, right, to glorify God.

Submit yourselves. And then the green highlights that you see are the attitudes and the things that are precious to God in regard to my attitude. Okay, for the Lord's sake, conscience toward God, your prayers will not be hindered. And even that precious in the sight of God in the yellow there, I was debating whether to make it green or not, and at the end of the day, it doesn't matter.

It's just an outline. It's an imperfect one, and that can be adjusted. Okay, but the reason I do this is just so that it organizes the main thoughts in my head and keeps me focused on what's the main point. And then the underlying stuff are all the human institutions.

We covered servants, masters a couple weeks back, and today we're looking at wives and husbands. The red bolded words are the key words, okay? And remember, the not only to those who are good and gentle, and this is to the slave masters, but in the same way for the wife and the husband, kind of reminds me of that, right?

So even if a husband is a punk, in the same way, even if a wife is the biggest bratty princess, even if the wife is abusive, in the same way. So it kind of, not only to those who are good and gentle, but also to those who are crooked, who are perverted, right?

So it keeps me focused on the thrust of the whole thing. The peach text is the how, and there are a lot of hows for the woman. And it's not because women need more biblical instruction than men, but there are a lot of hows for the wives. Winning over without a word, chaste and respectful behavior, gentle and quiet spirit, being submissive, obey, do what is right, without being frightened.

And it just, and again, I didn't look at like every participle, every word, and does this all belong in this column? I just put this together, so that if I was to instruct my daughter on how to be a good wife, I immediately can go to this column, okay?

The italicized stuff, just all the be submissives are in the participles, and even the live is in the participle. Remember, the main verb is to submit yourself. So that first column that you see is just in terms of the submission. The second column is to whom to submit. The third column are just the different subordinate ideas.

And we're gonna look at today like this light blue highlight part, all of those words are phobos, like phobia. They're all translated a bit differently. But if you're reading through 1 Peter, you see the word phobos a lot, okay? And it's interesting because without being frightened by any fear, the second word is not phobos.

That's the only one that's not phobos. But what is this phobos? Okay, is it directed toward God, or is it directed toward men? And that's very important for us to understand who do we need to fear, who do we need to show fear to, okay, as we conduct our lives in fear.

And the yellow highlight are the charis with God that we looked at a few weeks back. So when I look at this, it keeps me hedged in. And in the blue in the middle is the italicized, just the example of Christ. And I highlighted in the red, even if any.

Do you guys see that? Even if any. So the Greek construction, the three words there, and the cultural study that I did as I was preparing this thing makes me feel like this church had a lot of men. Okay, so it's not like, if you go to church in China, if you go to the underground church, I've met people from churches where 99% of the church was women.

But in this context, I don't think that's the case. Because culturally, it would be strange for a woman to be at church by herself. That would take a bold woman. Okay, in this context. So there are a lot of men in here. Just the grammatical construction of the Greek leads me to feel and slightly conclude that this is a big group of Christians, and then there are exceptional cases where the woman is there without her husband.

All right, so that's why I highlight that in the red. Now, just as a review of all of the stuff that we've been looking at, what is God's will for the Christian? We're trying to figure out if you're a Christian. Actually, don't do that. This is you, all right?

I had a really quick second thought. This is you if you profess faith in Christ. This is God's will for your life. More important than your job, more important than who you will marry, if you're already married, I'm sorry. More important than these big, lofty decisions, this is your life.

What is his call for you? And here are just a few, all right? 1 Peter 1, 13-15. "Therefore prepare your minds for action, "keep sober in spirit, fix your hope completely "on the grace to be brought to you "at the revelation of Jesus Christ. "As obedient children," if you don't do these things, it's disobedience.

"As obedient children, do not be conformed "to the former lusts, which were yours in your ignorance." Okay, your eyes have been opened now. "But like the Holy One who called you, "be holy yourselves also in all your behavior." The word behavior, if you guys have noticed, nod your heads if you've noticed, it comes out a lot, conduct, behavior, behavior, behavior.

Okay, so 1 Peter 2, 15. "This is the will of God, such is the will of God, "that by doing right, you may silence "the ignorance of foolish men." Similar theme as without a word, winning over a husband, right? 1 Peter 2, 19-21, which we looked at a little bit last week.

"For this finds favor for the sake of conscience "toward God, a person bears up under sorrows "when suffering unjustly. "For what credit is there if when you sin "and are harshly treated, you endure it with patience? "But when you do what is right and suffer for it, "you patiently endure it, this finds favor with God.

"For you have been called to this purpose, "since Christ also suffered for you, "leaving you an example to follow in his steps." It talks about Christ's suffering. And remember the hoopoegramon, how do you, it's like a tracing, this is how Christ lived his life, so you follow that example because that's the purpose of God in your life.

But you know what's a little bit painful? The first few words in chapter 3, verse 1 says, "In the same way, wives." Now I'm tense in my heart. Does this mean that a wife who is being hurt and abused stays in an abusive relationship, in obedience to the will of God, in following the example of Christ?

Because the human mind goes there. Not just your mind went there. Yeah, it goes there. So is that what it means? And that's why we have to be very careful to try to extract what God meant through Peter's writing of this letter. 'Cause our mind naturally goes to the exceptions.

And I'm gonna talk about that in a little bit. But God's will for the Christian is, even if it means your harm, you live a good life. Okay, that's, live a good life. Live a holy life, live a submissive life, you live a life that is full of good conduct.

Amen? Now what does that mean? Okay, now we have a hard time obeying it, just even if it's at risk for our inconvenience. Okay, but even if it means harm, our attitude should be one of willingness to submit ourself, even if we know that that decision will lead to pain.

Okay, so that's the call of the Christian. To save souls, to give glory to God, to build his church, to proclaim his excellencies, even at the risk of personal harm. That's what it says in 1 Peter, okay? And so what are the ramifications? We'll get into a little bit of that today.

Okay, this, it might be small. You know, my eyes are getting bad. So I'm like, I'm at that, it's weird, now I have to, I'm doing one of these things, okay? So if you can't see this, I'm sorry. And as God's, in his fairness and justice, I used to make fun of fat, bald, and blind people.

In his fairness, he's hit me with all kinds of stuff to sanctify me. Anyway, my eyes are bad, so I'm sorry if you're having a hard time reading this. But I hit the word fabos, in a search. And if you look at how many times 1 Peter, just one through three has this, if you guys notice, chapter 117, "If you address his father, the one who impartially judges "according to each one's work, "conduct yourselves in," what?

"Fabos," okay? "Honor all people, love the brotherhood, "fabos God, honor the king. "Servants, be submissive to your masters with all, "fabos. "Wives, as they observe your chaste "and fabos behavior. "Just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, "and you have become her children, "if you do what is right without being fabos, "by terror." Okay?

So if you actually hear the original language, you hear the word phobia, fabos, quite a bit. And then chapter three, verse 14 and 15, also include that. But is this fear toward man, like chapter three, verse two, "When they see your pure conduct with fear." Is that fear toward man?

Like is a wife supposed to cower before her husband? Or is this a wife's fear of God that causes her, even at the risk of harm, and at the risk of her pride, to be willing to endure the criticism of her husband, the mistreatment of her husband, because she fears and loves God?

So that's why this word is important. And you're gonna see this word fear come up again. And I did a study on that in chapter one, and we're not gonna cover it too much. But just know that a lot of these reverence and respect and fear, a lot of those words are all one and the same, with slightly different nuances.

All right? Now, I wanted to give some just words on the first century family structure. So in this culture, women were viewed as inferior to men. They received little or no respect socially, economically, or politically. And so this has been human history. And that's just how it has been, and that's one of the biggest ramifications of the fall of man, okay?

In this period of time, there was a thing that you would understand as patria potestas. That's the father's power, legal power over his kids, to the extreme. The children, for a father, was like his property, legally. Okay? And that power also applied to wives. Adult women had few legal rights of their own.

They could not vote or hold public office. And usually marriages in this time were arranged. When the girl was somewhere between 12 to 14, an arrangement was made. So this is not like freedom for you to isogete and be like, "Oh, if I'm a Christian woman, "and that's a non-Christian man, "maybe this is a verse I can use to say, "'See, I can get married to him.'" No, we're not looking at that, okay?

In this context, most marriages were arranged for some kind of political reason, okay? So in this culture, a wife becoming a Christian without her husband was a big deal. A husband likely is going to be socially embarrassed and shamed by this perceived act of defiance by his wife. So in this situation, a wife needed to be very prudent, okay?

Women often had social clubs where they shared gossip, okay? There was a bathhouse hour where the women gathered together to gossip and to talk religion and to do what women do when they're a bunch of them gathered together. And I'm going to leave it at that, or I'm going to get in trouble, okay?

And women generally are more interested in religion than men. Agree or disagree? Yeah, okay? So there are a lot of religious cults on this side. There's a polygamous culture, but women were more religious. They would end up with these little fan clubs of these different gods. And so religiosity in many ways was like a hobby in this culture.

Usually the family's religion was the father's decision and the father's choice. You guys following along? So if a man is a polytheist and his wife meets Christ and she wants to have him convinced that Christ is the only way because she's met him, she's encountered him, that's very tricky and that's very difficult.

But when a man meets Christ and he comes to faith, his whole family usually follows suit. Are you guys following that? That's why when I'm reading this, I'm like, okay, this is not a church where it's like 99% women. There's a lot of men in here. For the wife, there are a lot of social ramifications if she just chooses to say forget my husband and let me do my church thing.

Culturally, women sought to submit well because remember, in some ways, they were property in this time. So if I was a very good wife, I would want to submit well so that my husband can treat me as a trophy wife and so my husband can be honored and famed for whatever the reason.

And in this period of time, most adornment for women was usually the societal norm or modest adornment. So this wasn't talking about like some very radical idea. All of a sudden, like Peter says, dress appropriately. Don't worry about your hair or like all this other stuff. Now, Plutarch is a very famous Greek philosopher, and this is what he said.

"A wife should not acquire her own friends but should make her husband's friends her own. The gods are the first and most significant friends. For this reason, it is proper for a wife to recognize only those gods whom her husband worships and to shut the door to superstitious cults and strange superstitions." And he was contemporaneous to the situation of 1 Peter.

You guys on this? Hopefully, this gives you a little bit more insight into the dynamics of the household in 1 Peter. And I think that's why there are six verses for the wife because it's a lot trickier for a wife to try to submit herself to Christ going behind what may feel like her husband's back than for a husband to not be selfish and to be considerate.

Okay? All right, you guys gave me some kind of feedback. You guys get that, right? Okay. Now, this is what this passage is not saying. I figured this would be a more helpful wrap-up, okay? This is what this is not saying. This passage is not saying that all women should be subject to all men.

Okay? Some Christian organizations, like churches, whatever, they might have, like--okay, not churches. A church has structure because God--1 Corinthians 14, 33-- God is not a god of confusion but of order, okay? So there are different functions. But this passage is not saying that all women should be subject to all men, okay?

The second thing is the relationship between husband and wife is parallel to the relationship between master and slave. See, in the same way. That's not what it's saying. The relationship between master and slave, that's a human institution. The relationship between husband and wife, Genesis 1:27, God created man and woman in His own image.

Genesis 2:18, what does He do? He brings them together as a family. It is not good for a man to be alone, all right? So this is not the same. This is not saying it's okay for a Christian woman to marry a non-Christian man, or obviously vice versa. All right?

So some people who want to make some kind of a justification might use this. Holy wives address their husbands as Lord. I'm not going to go home today and be like, "Beggay." Did you study this week's passage? From now on, you don't call me babe, honey, yubba, or nothing.

You call me Lord. No. Okay, there are cultural nuances to this. But her calling Him Lord is in a present participle tense. It means this was her natural demeanor. Some of you guys, I'm sure you guys argued about, "Well, does that mean--?" Because he asked her to lie twice, right?

She threatened him and pressured him, and then he related with Hagar, out came a child, and then she got mad at him for listening to her. What is a man to do, right? All of that stuff. But generally, because for her, this man has been chosen by God, has been blessed by God, and me as a subordinate helper to this man, beyond all the cultural stuff, I will do my best to elevate this man.

That was her natural disposition. So she was regularly calling him Lord. Some commentators say, "Genesis 18.12. In that case, oh, shall I--?" He addressed him as Lord at the promise of the baby and all that stuff. But when I just look at the tense, it's like, look, that was her natural disposition toward her husband.

External beauty is of no value. External adornment is a sin, is not what it's saying. Amen? That's so funny that came from a dude. Yeah, it's okay to beautify yourself. But when beautifying yourself becomes your idol, when attention from men or attention from other ladies becomes your primary focus, then you've got some other issues that you work with.

Same thing for guys. I don't think this is only for the girls. Your buffness should not merely be external. Work out the inner man, right? Rather than just working out your pecs. So I've been focusing on working out the inner man. Okay, so--but external beauty is of value. This does not mean a wife can be like, "Oh, after I'm married, like, it doesn't matter what I look like." No, please brush your teeth, brush your hair, do stuff.

Okay? So external beauty is of value, but let your beauty not just--let your adornment not just be that of the external. All right? It is a noble thing for a woman to remain married to an abusive husband is not what this is saying. So I actually looked into--because I was curious what domestic violence laws and things look like in the Roman society.

It's very similar to what you and I live in today. Does domestic violence happen in today's cultural context? Yes. Is it illegal? Yes, it was illegal then. But domestic violence does not happen in the public square. Domestic violence does not happen just, like, where everyone knows. In a society where arranged marriages are the thing, domestic violence is actually a little bit more of a shameful thing.

There's a lot at stake when the families are arranged in marriage. So there was a lot of domestic violence, but not as much as you would think. So it's similar to today's context. So if my daughter were to tell me that her husband struck her, I wouldn't say that it's a noble thing for her to just go in there, right?

To stay there. There are many different things that we need to consider and talk through, and those are case by case, but where we need more scriptural knowledge, we definitely need more spiritual wisdom to know how to counsel this woman. If I am an abused woman, to know how to proceed.

Because even in scripture, like we talked about at our table, if a man cheats on his wife, the wife can leave her husband, right? But if she chooses to remain to minister to him, the Bible allows her to do so. I think most women would be more pained by a man cheating on her than by him hitting her.

True or false? We need to use discretion and wisdom before we just blanket apply passages like this to the sisters in our church and our culture. And we need to protect. But that's kind of a sensitive and tricky thing. Right? It wasn't this time. So when you say, "Well, in the same way," right?

We have to be a little bit cautious when we try to do that, all right? Lastly, chapter three, verse seven, talking about the weaker vessel. Some ladies, like, I'm sure, it raised some colorful discussions. That's why we have separate men and women, except my group, okay? This is not saying that women are inferior to men.

The Bible, nowhere in the New Testament does it ever teach that. Intellectually substandard or more prone to wickedness? They're more, they're like, they're weaker. So they're more prone to evil. That is not the case. There's a different function, and if there is weakness, it could be societal, it could be physical, but it's not in worth.

You get that? Okay? So that's what this passage is not saying. Now, there's a lot that we can go into this. It's a lot of, there's a lot of counseling involved in trying to dissect every aspect of this passage, so we're not gonna do that just for the sake of time.

But the word fear, who are we to fear more, God or man? The one who can kill the body, or who can send both the body and soul to hell? Who are we to fear more? God. Who's more powerful, God or man? God, thank you, TJ. Is that TJ a student?

Yes, God, right? Are we serving a tyrant of a God, or a God who is perfectly good and is perfectly loving? The latter, right? So as we're wrestling through these things and trying to figure out, like, okay, day to day, this is not hard to apply. Men, we need to stop being inconsiderate, and like little boys, okay?

We need to really be protective and sacrificial with our wives, with our emotion, with our time, with everything. We need to die to ourselves for the sake of our wives and for our family, okay? That's common sense. Women, it's an art to raise up and elevate your husband as the head of the house.

If you've gotten into a habit of tearing your husband down or nagging him all the time, or just cutting down his worth, or purposely mocking him by saying, "Well, the Bible, I know, says to submit, "but you're making bozo decisions. "I'm not gonna submit to no bozo," right? In those situations, you need some counsel.

Even in those situations, the call is to submit. I'm not gonna go as far as I call him Lord, right? But you need to submit, even when you think he's doing it all wrong, okay? That's the day to day common. In the exception cases, we're gonna do that case by case, all right?

Now, we're serving a good God who has our best interest in mind. He is not a God of confusion or of chaos. He is a God of peace and order. And he is all powerful, and this is something we covered a few weeks back about what this God has done for you and is continuing to do for those who submit to his lordship in their lives.

All right, I'm just gonna read that. "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ "who according to his great mercy "has caused us to be born again to a living hope "through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead "to obtain an inheritance which is imperishable and undefiled, "will not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, "who are protected by the power of God through faith "for salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.

"In this you greatly rejoice, "even though now for a little while, if necessary, "you've been distressed by various trials. "Why? So that the proof of your faith, "being more precious than gold which is perishable, "even though tested by fire, "may be found a result in praise and glory and honor "at the revelation of Jesus Christ." If you haven't noticed, there are many similar words used here as they are used in today's passage.

Imperishable, precious. You guys following that? Okay. So this is not next week. Next week is Passion Week. So we'll see you Monday through Wednesday for devotions here and then Thursday for a Passover meal and Friday for the Good Friday service. But this is for April 20th. We're doing nine verses.

That's the most we've ever done. Okay? But you have two weeks. So you can do four and a half a week. All right? So chapters 3 verses 8 to 16, 2 to 4 are pretty much the same. Question number 5 is, "What does it mean for you to sanctify Christ as Lord in your heart?" It sounds nice.

It sounds very, like, photo-frame--like, frame-worthy. But what is that, to sanctify Christ as Lord in my heart? Always being ready to make a defense. Okay, what is that? Okay? And then today, I want to-- in the discussions that you have with your small group members, if you're married, in what specific areas do you need help in better applying these verses?

Any sins to confess or practical applications to make. You don't want today's study just to be an academic exercise. How do we apply this in our marriage? If you're unmarried, in what practical ways do you need to improve in the way you are interacting with the human institutions nearest to you?

Because regardless of whether you're married or not, your beauty and your macho beauty, it needs to be that of the inner self, the inner man. Right? So what areas do you need wisdom and improvement? Secondly, are there specific ways your group members can pray for you as you grow in fearing God over consequence?

And that's how I characterized it. Fearing God will lead you to certain things. Fearing consequence will lead you to other applications. All right? Okay. So I'll give you guys time to break up into your groups, but let me pray close for us, and then we'll wrap up the teaching portion.

Lord, give us wisdom. Give us humility. And lead us to genuinely consider others more significant than ourselves. Help us to look after not only our own needs but to the needs of others. Help us to imitate Christ in every way that we can. And, Lord, in the event you lead us to suffer for good, I pray that you would give us joy, that you would guard our hearts, and, Lord, that our response to those painful circumstances really can give you the glory that you are due.

Help us in times of peace and in times of suffering to proclaim your excellencies. For you are the God who has called us out of darkness into his marvelous light. So help us to reflect you appropriately in our lives, in our relationships, in our attitudes, in our conduct. In all of these things we pray in Jesus' name.

Amen.