back to index2022-07-10 Lauren Chun Baptism Testimony
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My name is Lauren and I'm a recent graduate from UC Riverside and it's a privilege to 00:00:10.280 |
be able to share with you this morning how God has worked in my life. 00:00:15.080 |
I had grown up attending church every Sunday as early as I can remember. 00:00:18.800 |
I have fond memories of it from when I was a child, but still I would not have considered 00:00:24.440 |
myself a church kid as many people's testimonies would go and there are many reasons for that. 00:00:29.920 |
Since early childhood, I was taught about God and as I would graduate into the next 00:00:33.840 |
ministries as I got older, my curiosity would ever so slightly grow too. 00:00:38.960 |
Transitioning into middle school, I moved to a different area and before that I had 00:00:44.960 |
During that time in youth ministry, I found the pastor's messages very engaging and encouraging 00:00:54.280 |
There God revealed his presence to me through worship and prayer. 00:00:57.080 |
For the first time, I felt that God was in the same room as me and that he wanted to 00:01:03.720 |
The church I went to did not emphasize the importance of being in the word. 00:01:07.120 |
My relationship with him was vague, but my desire to be near him was strong. 00:01:11.760 |
I only knew God to be a feeling, so when life continued to move, I fell away due to my lack 00:01:17.000 |
In my first year of high school, my church relocated. 00:01:20.520 |
Many of my friends went to a different church. 00:01:22.600 |
The remaining people were all very close to each other, being family friends and going 00:01:27.600 |
Though I knew most of them my whole life, it was a group that was difficult to infiltrate. 00:01:32.680 |
My family seemed to share the same sentiment and slowly we stopped going. 00:01:36.720 |
Finally, I found myself in a relationship very early in my first year of high school. 00:01:41.880 |
He was everything to me, my taste and my identity shaped by him, my friends attached to him, 00:01:48.360 |
He was not Christian and at the time, my relationship with God was something I still treasured and 00:01:57.400 |
I knew that this was something that a Christian was not supposed to do because of the many 00:02:02.800 |
I knew God was watching and would be displeased, but my lust and curiosity led me to continue 00:02:08.240 |
I felt like I was building a wall thicker and thicker between me and God because I couldn't 00:02:14.040 |
face him and the guilt only started to fade away as my heart began to harden. 00:02:18.920 |
But even still, I knew that God saw right through this wall and being on the other side, 00:02:22.360 |
I saw right through this wall as well and yet I couldn't reach him. 00:02:25.560 |
There was something in me that still desired the comfort I had felt that I only knew came 00:02:31.200 |
After a couple years, we broke up and naturally my whole world shattered. 00:02:35.360 |
We shared the same friends who would circumstantially reveal that their loyalty sided with him. 00:02:40.600 |
I sought to fill the void in my heart with other relationships, but instead hurt those 00:02:44.440 |
I used selfishly for physical and emotional comfort and lost almost all of the remaining 00:02:51.240 |
As much as I wanted to care about, didn't want to care about anything anymore going 00:02:55.300 |
into college, I learned very quickly that drinking and searching for validation in others 00:03:03.200 |
Still early in my first year of college, I was invited to attend a retreat by one of 00:03:09.840 |
the Christian fellowships on campus by a hallmate of mine. 00:03:12.400 |
I really had nothing to lose and I also thought that I hadn't been in a Christian retreat 00:03:18.880 |
I got to the retreat and I was excited to meet people, but during the morning devotional, 00:03:26.000 |
I knew that he brought me there for a reason and I promised to him that I would hear him 00:03:29.280 |
out with what he had to say that weekend and God challenged me through this promise. 00:03:33.720 |
Through the messages and through the conversations I had with people, I realized how little I 00:03:41.640 |
There were so many concepts I've never heard of and I was shocked to learn how much I misunderstood, 00:03:47.120 |
not even knowing the gospel by name, but just as a mere story in the Bible. 00:03:51.920 |
For the first time, I had met people who exuded joy because of their close relationship with 00:03:56.000 |
Christ and they naturally poured out a love that was supernatural. 00:03:59.400 |
During a Q&A, I sat in distress learning about what Christians believed and why and how it 00:04:04.640 |
contradicted to the values that I held that were shaped by the world. 00:04:09.400 |
I had told God that I would hear him out and I knew that if I chose one of these world 00:04:13.560 |
views, I would have to completely reject the other. 00:04:16.360 |
A staffer approached me and walked me through a few of my questions and through the gospel 00:04:23.000 |
once more and asked me if I wanted to accept Christ in my life. 00:04:26.360 |
Although my understanding was elementary, I knew very well that there was nowhere else 00:04:32.600 |
to run that would be able to fill the emptiness in my heart. 00:04:36.840 |
I realized then it wasn't God who wasn't answering to me all these years, but me who did not 00:04:41.640 |
All of my life, I had sinned against the holy God who created me and loved me even though 00:04:48.000 |
God already shed his love for me by sending his one and only begotten son to die on the 00:04:54.480 |
And as a sinner, I could do nothing to repay such a debt I owe to the one and only who 00:05:02.160 |
I prayed to accept Christ and give him my life. 00:05:04.840 |
From that point on, I was like a sponge wanting to know everything about God and soak in everything. 00:05:09.800 |
And as the years in college passed, God continued to walk with me and sanctify me. 00:05:14.560 |
And though it was challenging at times, I saw my desires change and my joy grow in him 00:05:21.040 |
And seeing even more greatly each day how depraved I was and still am makes me tremble 00:05:26.880 |
in fear and awe and beyond grateful for this grace that I've been given.