back to indexWed Bible Study (1 Peter) Lesson 7 - 02-22-17
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So, as we look at our passage, we see that actually connection to previous thought, connection 00:00:13.400 |
to previous passages, the idea and theme remains that this major exhortation to be able to 00:00:22.840 |
submit is a running theme in this passage, right? 00:00:27.080 |
We saw that if you just take a look at your Bibles all the way from chapter 2, that the 00:00:32.240 |
idea of submission runs from verse 13, that you need to submit yourselves for the Lord's 00:00:38.520 |
sake to human institutions, governors, all this kind of stuff. 00:00:43.720 |
Then in verse 18, he asked that servants, so whether it be slaves to masters, and I 00:00:49.400 |
kind of expanded out to workers and et cetera, you need to learn how to submit. 00:00:54.000 |
And then there was this huge exhortation that we need to do this for the sake of Christ. 00:00:59.280 |
And then here we are with this idea of submission in the home. 00:01:03.480 |
But if you ask how, you know, in terms of the connection of the thought, the flow of 00:01:07.920 |
this actually started way back in chapter 1, verse 13. 00:01:13.120 |
When we saw that in chapter 1, that there was a huge kind of push for us to remember 00:01:18.720 |
and appreciate the salvation that we have, chapter 1, verse 13 made the transition, made 00:01:26.560 |
the flip and said, "This is how you start to apply." 00:01:30.240 |
And the reason why I bring that up is with 1 Peter, there is a overarching, big umbrella 00:01:37.160 |
theme that how we apply the gospel in our lives is learning how to surrender and submit 00:01:43.080 |
in various applications, various circumstances of our lives, right? 00:01:50.240 |
And I said how this book for me has been a challenge to my expectations, a challenge 00:01:58.880 |
The challenge to what I view as acceptable in our response to difficulty, suffering, 00:02:04.080 |
And that's really also what's going to be the case for chapter 3, verses 1 through 7. 00:02:11.200 |
That in terms of the situation that maybe can be found in the home, practically speaking, 00:02:16.780 |
what is going to be the application of the gospel? 00:02:20.860 |
The faith that we have has to express itself. 00:02:23.300 |
It's not only going to be just in the moment of salvation, but in the home too, the regular 00:02:32.540 |
He says, "This is what I expect of you," for the Christian, okay? 00:02:38.220 |
So reading verse 1 through 2 again, let's read it and I'll read it for us. 00:02:42.820 |
It says, "In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands, so that even if any 00:02:51.220 |
of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior 00:02:56.300 |
of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior." 00:03:02.700 |
If I were to just do a simple summary and outline of this passage, I would just make 00:03:07.260 |
it this four-point outline that I have there. 00:03:09.980 |
There is a command, the main point, be submissive. 00:03:13.820 |
There is a clear, "so that" the non-believers may be won. 00:03:17.780 |
There is a means or the content of how you're going to apply that. 00:03:22.140 |
It says, "By the behavior and character of your life." 00:03:24.980 |
And then there's an example, "Just like Sarah and holy women of the past." 00:03:29.620 |
So this is actually a nice, what you call a pericope. 00:03:32.340 |
It's like a nice section that you can take and say, "Hmm, there's just this nice flow 00:03:39.940 |
There's the command, the punch, boom, you need to be submissive. 00:03:44.420 |
And then there's the supporting ideas, giving you both the rationale and the purpose, the 00:03:49.140 |
means and the example of how we're to do that. 00:03:53.460 |
So as I was thinking about this, I could have just followed the same line of thought and 00:03:59.420 |
But you know how in volleyball, there's like serve, bump, set, and then spike? 00:04:05.620 |
So I was hoping that maybe we can just kind of flip it around. 00:04:09.180 |
In terms of giving you the example first, saying this is the example of how God is seeing 00:04:14.860 |
what women should be like, and then the means by which they're going to achieve, and then 00:04:20.780 |
So I'm going to reorder it and kind of work backwards for the section on the ladies. 00:04:26.260 |
So let's jump to verse five, verse five and six, and look at the example. 00:04:35.540 |
He says, "For in this way in former times, the holy women also who hoped in God used 00:04:40.500 |
to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands. 00:04:44.500 |
Just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, and you have become her children if 00:04:48.900 |
you do what is right without being frightened by any fear." 00:04:54.260 |
So the example for you to follow is to be this holy woman, just as they were in the 00:05:00.300 |
And if I were to give a sermon title for this, I would just call it Be Holy Woman. 00:05:05.460 |
But what's more, there is just these running themes about what they did that will really 00:05:19.260 |
As an example of what you should mimic, it says that they placed their hope in God. 00:05:26.460 |
Now as we think about this, I ask this question, what does hope have to do with this command 00:05:34.100 |
Now as we think about that for a moment, how does hope relate to this command to submit? 00:05:42.780 |
We get actually one of the greatest things that's going to be the solution for every 00:05:49.340 |
Isn't hope that thing which really is synonymous with faith that caused every single individual 00:05:56.100 |
in Hebrews chapter 11 to be able to do what they did? 00:06:00.660 |
Isn't hope what they possessed in their heart that encouraged them to both suffer, to have 00:06:07.060 |
loss of their possession, and continue to persevere even in the midst of all their suffering? 00:06:12.780 |
Hope is actually so tied to any kind of difficulty, any act and application of our faith, that 00:06:19.860 |
hope is what's revealed when we continue to do things like submit. 00:06:27.900 |
The evidence that we have hope is the application of submitting, enduring, and continuing to 00:06:34.180 |
press on even in the circumstances that we find ourselves in. 00:06:42.900 |
The woman that he is speaking to, specifically on a circumstance that could be incredibly 00:06:54.340 |
He calls out that these are women who potentially are wives to unbelieving husbands. 00:07:01.180 |
Not only is it just simply unbelieving, but says they're disobedient to the word. 00:07:06.620 |
Now in relation, I just want to ask this question, in relation to various things that can go 00:07:11.720 |
wrong in your life, where would that measure? 00:07:17.180 |
Now it's kind of like a, I guess you can say a messed up question to ask. 00:07:23.940 |
Are we trying to, what if there was somebody in here who was, you know? 00:07:31.300 |
It's like, "Yeah, you're married to an unbelieving husband." 00:07:34.700 |
And the reason why I ask that is because we have to kind of put ourselves in their shoes 00:07:39.620 |
and realize that however bad we might think that it is today, that in their time, being 00:07:45.220 |
married to an unbelieving husband could have been so detrimental to the well-being of their 00:07:50.980 |
I mean, already they lived in a culture where women was seen as a possession. 00:07:55.340 |
Already they lived in a culture where men had the right to do whatever they wanted to 00:08:00.660 |
To the degree that if they believed that the wife has sinned or committed some kind of 00:08:05.060 |
offense worthy, the husband could execute her. 00:08:09.500 |
So if this man is an unbelieving individual, think of the situation they find themselves 00:08:17.420 |
And the reason why I say, then in that moment, in that moment, their ability to continue 00:08:26.300 |
on shows and proves they have a hope greater than just in their circumstance. 00:08:33.460 |
Just as every single disappointing moment that we could potentially have in this life 00:08:37.260 |
with some sense you're young to when you're older, whether it be you're hoping that you'll 00:08:41.860 |
go to a good college or you're hoping that you'll land a good job or you're hoping that 00:08:46.400 |
you'll get married to a good, nice Christian individual or you're hoping you'll have a 00:08:50.340 |
nice family, hoping you can raise a good family at a good church and hoping X, Y, and Z. 00:08:55.380 |
Every single one of those moments is going to be a test of your hope. 00:09:04.700 |
So I'm coming at this forefront of the idea that the holy woman that Apostle Peter is 00:09:10.500 |
thinking about weren't just simply women who took a beating and then they survived. 00:09:22.620 |
We're talking about women who had an incredible amount of hope in the God they trusted that 00:09:28.860 |
caused their ability and gave them power to continue to endure. 00:09:36.420 |
In thinking about that then, in terms of the hope that they had in God, this is the 00:09:45.100 |
And it says with that ability, they adorned themselves with submission. 00:09:52.620 |
If you guys can, I have a little table for you there asking the question, you know, how 00:10:01.020 |
On a grand scale of things, we might have a very, I don't know, subconsciously very chauvinistic 00:10:08.780 |
It's like, you know, just be quiet and do what they say versus, you know, something 00:10:13.860 |
that's good in terms of what submission would look like. 00:10:16.660 |
So as a table, as a group, please fill in that table. 00:10:19.820 |
What would be some markers or principles of good submission that a wife could show versus 00:10:29.740 |
So at this time, you guys should at least have a couple in each box. 00:10:37.860 |
If I could have a raise of hand of someone who wants to just share what they put on the 00:10:49.500 |
So bearing with your husband even if he's wrong. 00:10:58.340 |
Having that patience to, you know, even when he's wrong or whatnot, to bear with him. 00:11:07.860 |
How about, let's see, that was a guy's table. 00:11:12.220 |
So far table on the right, on the good side of submission. 00:11:35.220 |
And one more for the good side of the submission. 00:11:49.060 |
So honoring and respecting the one that you are submitting to. 00:12:01.980 |
How about directly ahead of me with Anson, Jeremy, Paul? 00:12:16.660 |
Just following without considering if that's sin or not. 00:12:20.660 |
From the woman's side, she's got to be thinking, right? 00:12:23.780 |
Whether this is the will of God or whether it's contrary and actual sin. 00:12:32.540 |
Submitting with a level of arrogance and pride, because you can do that. 00:12:58.100 |
So as we kind of described these two categories of what submission is, part of the reason 00:13:04.660 |
why I had you guys do this is because I think submission is, one, the passage or the book 00:13:15.500 |
A topic where you're applying this in various scenarios in various ways. 00:13:20.180 |
But what's more, it's actually a large topic conceptually for us too. 00:13:28.100 |
So the Ephesians passage, when it talks about subjection and submission, I'm just going 00:13:33.620 |
It says, "Wives, be subject to your own husbands as to the Lord, for the husband is 00:13:37.540 |
the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, he himself being the savior 00:13:43.700 |
But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands 00:13:53.020 |
And if you just take that and say, "Okay, that's it." 00:13:59.380 |
There's a danger of you going outside of the bounds of scripture, so to speak. 00:14:03.620 |
Because there are ways in which what submission shouldn't be. 00:14:07.460 |
I absolutely agree with all the various things that you guys said in terms of what submission 00:14:13.040 |
Submission should not be, I turn off my brain and whatever this man says, that's what's 00:14:19.380 |
Rather, the way that even the passage that we're looking at, there is an intentional, 00:14:26.140 |
there is an attitude that makes submission what it is. 00:14:30.700 |
What's more, this kind of submission where if you are to just submit in every single 00:14:34.780 |
way that you're avoiding to change your husband in any single way and there's nothing you're 00:14:42.060 |
trying to exhort the husband to do, rather he's commanding you. 00:14:45.820 |
Because that's not necessarily submission either. 00:14:48.580 |
So sometimes when I hear these, I go to some weddings and they have these wedding vows 00:14:52.100 |
like, "I'll never make you stop playing video games. 00:14:56.900 |
And that I'm just like, "That's not submission either." 00:15:03.860 |
Because the passage itself says you're trying to win your husband. 00:15:09.500 |
What's more, having a kind of dependency on your husband where in every single aspect 00:15:15.900 |
of your life, both physically and spiritually, where you're so tied to your husband that 00:15:20.740 |
he is your hope, that's a wrong kind of submission. 00:15:24.300 |
We just talked about how even when the wife is in the relationship with her husband, that 00:15:29.500 |
kind of relationship has to be one which her hope is in God. 00:15:36.140 |
So as we think about that a little bit, we're going to describe in greater detail through 00:15:40.900 |
going through this passage what submission rightly is. 00:15:47.100 |
In that example of what holy women did, it started off with saying they hoped in God 00:15:52.260 |
that they were being submissive and then later it says, "Just as Sarah obeyed Abraham calling 00:15:56.980 |
him Lord and you have become her children, if you," what? 00:16:07.720 |
Please turn your Bibles over to 2 Corinthians chapter 7 verse 11. 00:16:24.540 |
It says, starting from verse 11 down to verse 12, it says, "For behold what earnestness 00:16:30.740 |
in this very thing, this godly sorrow has produced in you, what vindication of yourselves, 00:16:36.300 |
what indignation, what fear, what longing, what zeal, what avenging of wrong. 00:16:40.780 |
In everything you demonstrated yourselves to be innocent in the matter. 00:16:45.260 |
So although I wrote to you, it was not for the sake of the offender nor for the sake 00:16:49.100 |
of the one offended, but that your earnestness on our behalf might be made known to you in 00:16:58.620 |
So there is a sense in which when we think about good submission, that good submission 00:17:04.700 |
has the idea of both being innocent and doing what is right in the sight of God in every 00:17:12.980 |
In good submission, there is a constant intentionality and thinking of what's good in this moment. 00:17:19.420 |
What's good for my husband who is not a believer? 00:17:22.180 |
What's good for our family, you know, who we will, even if we find ourselves in desperate 00:17:28.820 |
So rather than actually think of submission at an attitude of, "Fine, have it your way." 00:17:35.940 |
No, the person who is submitting is actually constantly thinking intentionally what is 00:17:42.220 |
good, godly, kind, peaceful, lovely in the sight of God in this circumstance. 00:17:49.100 |
So there's a sense in which the one who is submitting in this scenario to a husband who 00:17:54.180 |
is not a believer is thinking even harder than the husband. 00:17:59.660 |
Is thinking even far above and beyond what the husband might be thinking. 00:18:03.940 |
That they are desiring to have a clarity of conscience before the Lord, doing what is 00:18:11.460 |
What's more, good submission is without fear. 00:18:17.500 |
He says, or the passage says that we are, or the ladies are children of Sarah if they 00:18:27.780 |
Think about that for a moment on how that connects. 00:18:37.460 |
A bad form of submission is when you're so frightened of the consequences that your motivation 00:18:48.180 |
That you're just scared of what's going to happen, you're just scared of etc, etc. 00:18:52.740 |
That's not the proper motivation for submission. 00:18:55.660 |
So that kind of submission will always bear its fruit. 00:19:01.100 |
Especially even with us and any relationship that we have, especially with us and our relationship 00:19:05.420 |
with God, that kind of submission and obedience is going to bear its own fruit. 00:19:11.420 |
But just like we said earlier, the hope that we have in God is going to remove that fear, 00:19:16.980 |
is going to tend to that fear and cause us to have an ability to submit with a proper 00:19:23.660 |
And we're going to talk about that more as we move forward. 00:19:28.540 |
So, so far we've described the submission that ladies are supposed to have in these 00:19:35.180 |
But and um, I'm just going to skip number six where it says, "Abraham and Sarah, why 00:19:45.860 |
By just kind of brief, just for the sake of time, you know, he's making this case that 00:19:51.860 |
this design of the structure was not something that he just made up. 00:19:56.980 |
That this design was a calling of God, especially because his readers have an element of the 00:20:03.740 |
If you notice, there's a lot of Jewish terminology, lots of quotation of the Old Testament. 00:20:07.860 |
And as they see Abraham and Sarah as the father, you know, father Abraham of their, of their 00:20:13.020 |
nation, um, he said, he's pointing to that saying, this is the calling of God and the 00:20:21.860 |
But what we're going to do is change gear a little bit and go to verse three and verse 00:20:29.340 |
He says, "Your adornment must not be merely external, braiding the hair, wearing gold 00:20:34.780 |
jewelry or putting on dresses, but let it be the hidden person of the heart with the 00:20:40.060 |
imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of 00:20:48.500 |
So earlier, the way that I put it was, here is the example of what you want to be, right? 00:20:56.180 |
And then here in verse three and four is describing in greater detail the content of that example 00:21:01.700 |
and the means by which you're going to accomplish what God has designed for you. 00:21:06.940 |
He talks about first what not to do, just simply trying to win the heart of people by 00:21:13.980 |
externals, simply trying to change what's on the outside, simply trying to improve whatever 00:21:21.420 |
But he says to work on the internal, the quality of being gentle and quiet in spirit. 00:21:27.540 |
Now I want to ask you, for those of you guys who did your homework, if you guys noticed, 00:21:32.140 |
I said, go to a website that has Bible helps of looking up Greek words, and there's a resource 00:21:41.420 |
I'm not sure if you guys were able to do that, but did you guys get a chance to look at that? 00:21:46.500 |
If someone did, can you kind of yell out what you found as a definition or a gloss of that 00:22:06.860 |
So this idea of gentleness, yeah, in the way that it's used in scripture, it has got very 00:22:19.620 |
When you think about this idea of being gentle, right? 00:22:22.700 |
I mean, there's a sense that sometimes the way we can use it, but when you go to that 00:22:27.340 |
website and you look at the resource, here's one of the definitions that it has as like 00:22:35.180 |
He says, "This idea of gentleness has an idea of meekness toward God in the disposition 00:22:40.800 |
of the spirit where we accept his dealings with us as good, and therefore, without disputing 00:22:49.500 |
In the Old Testament, the meek are those wholly relying on God rather than their own strengths 00:22:55.180 |
Thus, meekness towards evil people means knowing God is permitting the injuries they inflict, 00:22:59.780 |
that he is using them to purify his elect, and that he will deliver his elect in time. 00:23:05.860 |
Gentleness and meekness as opposite of being self-assertive and self-interested, it stems 00:23:10.940 |
from this trust and hope in God's goodness and control over the situation." 00:23:16.980 |
So just as a means of like Bible study for you guys, that blueletter.com, for just anybody 00:23:22.540 |
who doesn't necessarily know the Greek can just click onto it to get a bigger sense of 00:23:26.820 |
how is this word used generally in the scripture. 00:23:30.500 |
It definitely, it generally gives like a nice description of what that word would mean. 00:23:36.060 |
But I think as a combination of the two, just think about this individual, where their submission 00:23:42.500 |
is not, you know, again, just simply yielding and saying, "Fine, I'll do what you say." 00:23:54.300 |
It is an attitude of the heart where they express to the unbelieving spouse, or whether 00:24:00.620 |
in the cases of our submission to believing spouses, even whatever it may be, that there 00:24:04.980 |
is an attitude of hope and faith where we can have peace. 00:24:11.340 |
The kind of submission that he's asking for here, yes, involves yielding to the leadership 00:24:16.340 |
of the husband, but realize that it involves this aspect of a character, the quality, and 00:24:27.340 |
This he says is precious in the sight of God. 00:24:32.260 |
Because our ability to not retaliate, our ability to not get revenge, our ability to 00:24:38.420 |
not just, you know, combat them, compete with them, and try to, you know, to basically dominate 00:24:54.020 |
So, in thinking about this then, going back to verse one, going back to verse one, and 00:25:01.260 |
verse two, it says, "In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands 00:25:05.380 |
so that, even if any one of them are obedient to the word, disobedient to the word, they 00:25:09.980 |
may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste 00:25:17.020 |
The challenge is that even in the home, even in an environment where, you know, naturally 00:25:24.540 |
there's supposed to be a, you know, kind of comfort level, naturally you're supposed to 00:25:29.380 |
let your guard down and all that kind of stuff, there is an expectation that we have winsome 00:25:36.340 |
That there is a purposeful intentionality where we're saying that in all we're doing, 00:25:40.900 |
in our both submissiveness, in what we're doing in terms of just, you know, respecting 00:25:45.740 |
them, in what we're doing with our, you know, our own purity, whatever it may be, we're 00:25:53.540 |
So, for those of you guys who, you know, might be thinking, "Yeah, this specific passage 00:25:59.060 |
doesn't directly apply to you because you're not a spouse of an unbeliever in the home." 00:26:04.700 |
But this same attitude should be exhibited by every single one of us. 00:26:11.700 |
Whether we're dealing with difficult people, whether we're dealing with various circumstances 00:26:15.460 |
outside of the house, this is the attitude we should have. 00:26:20.140 |
That by our behavior and our attitude, they're being won over. 00:26:23.980 |
I mean, for you personally, you know, personally, there is this question. 00:26:29.140 |
When we experience injustice, our normal thoughts are not, "Win this individual over." 00:26:38.620 |
Can we get there where we're not thinking, "This individual needs to recognize their 00:26:48.580 |
But rather, you're thinking on the level of, you know, winning that individual over 00:27:00.660 |
Any questions, thoughts about verses 1 through 7? 00:27:07.540 |
I just want to summarize that section by saying this. 00:27:11.660 |
Earlier I mentioned that the challenge in this passage, especially given the context 00:27:19.020 |
they find themselves in, it is a kind of worldview-changing concept. 00:27:23.860 |
Now, for many of you, you guys have heard this before in terms of roles of women to 00:27:29.860 |
Now, that's something common to all of us who, let's say, are Bible-teaching churches 00:27:36.340 |
But, if you were to place yourself in their shoes and just think, right? 00:27:42.780 |
Just think that these ladies who, he's talking to people who for their faith have already 00:27:50.820 |
He's talking to people where there is systematic suffering for the people who call themselves 00:27:56.740 |
And I would imagine then that the husband, should he be a disobedient man, should he 00:28:01.860 |
be a pagan who buys into the philosophy of the world, might be thinking, "Look, now 00:28:06.860 |
he has reason and rationale because of what's going on in the government to even be harsher 00:28:14.540 |
And in that moment, what's natural for most people is either flee, run, get out of there. 00:28:22.700 |
But the scripture, rather than contrary to what is our natural reaction, says, "Even 00:28:31.460 |
Let your hope and faith shine even in one of those dire moments." 00:28:37.820 |
Then, I'm going to wrap up with exhortation to husbands. 00:28:46.220 |
And I know today, I think it's Husband's Day, right? 00:28:50.140 |
So I mean, not Husband's Day, but Father, Dads, there's people who are alternating. 00:28:54.680 |
So you guys can make sure you really pay attention here. 00:29:03.080 |
It says, "You husbands, in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as 00:29:08.520 |
with someone weaker, since she is a woman, and show her honor as a fellow heir of the 00:29:14.120 |
grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered." 00:29:17.720 |
Now, I want to ask you this question, and please take a moment to think about this. 00:29:23.840 |
Notice something from the beginning of the passage, that there is a continuity and connection 00:29:30.040 |
Just as there was at the beginning of verse 1, "In the same way, you wives submit." 00:29:36.160 |
And we saw a trail of thinking, a trail of rationale, which for us, we can easily connect. 00:29:42.440 |
Yeah, just like he said, "Submit to the government," there should be submission in the home. 00:29:49.340 |
With all the commands that are given here, how is this in the same pattern? 00:29:58.500 |
Aren't husbands supposed to not submit and lead? 00:30:05.620 |
Aren't husbands supposed to direct the wives? 00:30:07.380 |
Aren't husbands supposed to command and be that figure of strength or whatnot? 00:30:31.320 |
How is this for the command for the husband the same way as it is what we just read for 00:30:38.140 |
To have an attitude and heart as one who hopes in God. 00:30:43.140 |
Okay, to have an attitude and heart as one who hopes in God. 00:30:50.260 |
It's a chain of authority leading all the way back to God. 00:30:51.260 |
So the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:30:52.260 |
They have to submit to the authority surrounding them. 00:30:54.260 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:30:56.260 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:30:57.260 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:30:58.260 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:30:59.260 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:00.260 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:01.260 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:02.260 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:03.260 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:24.940 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:25.940 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:26.940 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:27.940 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:28.940 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:29.940 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:30.940 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:31.940 |
And the men don't have anything easier or better per se. 00:31:32.940 |
hierarchy right? Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. But nonetheless we are all still under the 00:31:37.680 |
authority of God. Together. Okay? But what's more, even in the concept of how we view, 00:31:44.340 |
how we view leadership, how we view the call of man, there's a sense in which both what 00:31:49.920 |
we do and both what women do are both dying to ourselves. Right? There's a sense in which 00:31:58.380 |
what we're called to do, a lot of times maybe we're thinking because we lead, because we 00:32:02.820 |
etc, etc, maybe that translates to us then, so now I'm in charge and I get to benefit 00:32:08.860 |
from their submission. But that's not the way God put it. The way that God put it is, 00:32:13.580 |
even for just as the wife is called to submit and therefore die to herself and make herself 00:32:19.540 |
vulnerable, there's a sense with the man as he leads, he dies to himself and he takes 00:32:24.440 |
responsibility for that vulnerable person. And so I want to make a call to all the guys 00:32:30.340 |
in here. If you think about leadership, we're going to have lots of different styles of 00:32:36.220 |
leadership. Some of us are going to be like real vocal, some of us are going to come off 00:32:39.940 |
real strong, etc, etc. But nonetheless, the summary of our leadership is going to be we 00:32:44.260 |
now have a huge burden and responsibility for the well-being of the individual. What 00:32:49.660 |
did I say about submission? Your submission is not just simply fine, you just tell me 00:32:53.940 |
what to do and I'll do it, because that's not real submission. You have to be constantly 00:32:57.740 |
thinking what is in the best in the sight of God. So likewise, husbands, thinking to 00:33:06.160 |
and asking what is spiritually, physically best for the people that I'm leading, it's 00:33:10.900 |
in the same thing, same category. We're trying to achieve and accomplish the same goal, yet 00:33:17.300 |
we have now different roles. And so I want to talk about that because I really do feel 00:33:23.260 |
like there is still a continuity behind what Apostle Peter is calling the wives to do and 00:33:30.740 |
what Apostle Peter is calling the husbands to do. And because for both concepts of submission 00:33:36.140 |
and leadership, this world has tainted it, we kind of find that it's just always like 00:33:40.740 |
this. We always find that it's always like at odds with each other in some way or another. 00:33:47.380 |
But that's typically because whatever gift we've been given by God, we learn to exploit. 00:33:52.780 |
So I want to start off with this idea that there is this continuity of idea and then 00:33:59.140 |
this passage challenges husbands to live with their wives in an understanding way. Let me 00:34:05.460 |
ask you another question. What are men supposed to understand? Now what's really interesting 00:34:11.100 |
as a kind of a setup for you guys while you think about that, is the NIV kind of says 00:34:16.780 |
like be considerate. And I'm going to be honest with you, many people have interpreted this 00:34:24.900 |
passage and I'll confess, six years ago, it's already been a long time, six years ago I 00:34:29.980 |
gave a sermon on being a man. And then I actually referenced this passage. And the way I interpreted 00:34:36.700 |
it was you have to be understanding because you know, woman logic. It's pretty bad, I'm 00:34:45.100 |
just confessing. The way I kind of made it sound was, yeah, there's a sense in which 00:34:49.580 |
men just have to be patient. You understand the struggles of women. You know how sometimes 00:34:53.620 |
insecure they are, you know, sometimes, et cetera, et cetera, they struggle with their 00:34:56.900 |
emotions and I'm just digging myself a hole. And then you just, men just have to understand 00:35:01.260 |
that, you know, have you guys seen those memes? Woman logic. And then it's just like, is that 00:35:06.940 |
what the Bible is saying? Live with women in an understanding way, which means you're 00:35:10.700 |
just supposed to be patient, you're just supposed to understand that they're, you know, they're 00:35:15.260 |
X, Y, and Z. Is that all it's saying? Like, what are you supposed to understand? Again, 00:35:23.060 |
there are a lot of people who interpret this passage by way of saying, understanding just 00:35:27.780 |
means just consider, be considerate of them, be patient with them. Is that all he's saying? 00:35:33.540 |
Okay. For the sake of time, I'm going to let you think about that for a little bit and 00:35:39.460 |
then I make this case. No way. Right? Otherwise it would seem kind of not fair. Right? To 00:35:46.180 |
the woman, like we just went six verses of like, you need to submit, you need to have 00:35:49.860 |
character in the heart, you need to do this. And it's like, guys, just be patient with 00:35:53.180 |
them. Okay? Like, is that, is that all he's saying? And absolutely not. I don't think 00:35:57.780 |
so. I think when he's saying this, the, you have to, you have to take into consideration 00:36:04.700 |
how it actually comes off. In the Greek, the way it reads is husbands, likewise dwelling 00:36:10.260 |
together with knowledge. Okay? So it doesn't just say be patient with these women. In the 00:36:15.900 |
Greek, the way it reads is husbands dwell together with knowledge. Okay? So by way of 00:36:22.780 |
application, you're supposed to live and be with her with full knowledge. But I asked 00:36:30.140 |
the question of what if you think the answer to that is just the way she thinks that would 00:36:37.660 |
be too small. Why? Because the huge chunk, remember earlier I said that the application, 00:36:43.620 |
the application of all that we know of the gospel comes in first Peter chapter one, verse 00:36:48.620 |
13. We'll take a look at it. Okay? So let's go back in your Bible. It's chapter one, verse 00:36:53.820 |
12, 13 and 14. And this is what it says. It was revealed to them that they were not serving 00:36:58.340 |
themselves, but you and these things which are now have been announced to you through 00:37:01.940 |
those who preach the gospel to you by the Holy Spirit. When the Holy Spirit sent from 00:37:06.900 |
heaven things into which angels long to look. Therefore, what prepare your minds for action, 00:37:14.060 |
keep sober in spirit and fix your hope completely on the grace to be brought to you at the revelation 00:37:18.980 |
of Jesus Christ as obedient children do not be conformed to the former lusts, which were 00:37:23.420 |
yours in what in your ignorance. So when the apostle says you need to live in knowledge, 00:37:31.980 |
he's not just talking about, Oh, you just need to be patient with these women. No, he's 00:37:38.300 |
saying all that is pertaining to a higher knowledge of your worldview in Christ, of 00:37:43.460 |
your worldly through the spirit that all applies. So namely he says, stop giving into your pagan 00:37:49.540 |
lust. Stop being so selfish like you were before, where all you thought about is gratifying 00:37:55.060 |
your flesh, exploiting this woman who's called to serve, called to submit and then saying, 00:38:01.060 |
serve me, give me what I want. Right? So your worldview of what marriage commitment should 00:38:09.380 |
look like your worldview of your role as a husband, your worldview of her role, your 00:38:14.100 |
worldview of family contentment and wellbeing, all this stuff matters. And then as a subset, 00:38:22.740 |
there's an understanding of who she is. That would only be a small part of the greater 00:38:28.140 |
knowledge he wants us to live by. So that's why I'm not sure if many of you guys have 00:38:33.780 |
read this book. For those of you guys who are single, I recommend you read it. For those 00:38:37.180 |
of you guys are married, I recommend you read it. There's a guy named Stuart Scott who wrote 00:38:40.740 |
a book called exemplary husband, first three chapters, theology. He says, this is what 00:38:45.780 |
a leader should know. Why? Because if you have no idea what you should do, you're not 00:38:49.660 |
a leader. Makes sense. You should be leading with full knowledge. Well, of a worldview, 00:38:57.740 |
you should be a, in many ways, a theologian of what God is expecting from us. Okay? So 00:39:05.340 |
in thinking about that a little bit, when it says for us to dwell with, with her in 00:39:11.460 |
knowledge, it is challenging us, especially as men to apply the gospel in how we are dwelling 00:39:17.860 |
and living with her. What's more moving forward. It says living with her in an understanding 00:39:24.780 |
way as with someone weaker since she is a woman. Okay. And, uh, Oh wait, I think I kind 00:39:34.100 |
of messed up the order here. Sorry. Um, we're going to kind of go out of order a little 00:39:41.900 |
bit in terms of, um, that section where it says weaker, we'll come back to that. And 00:39:48.380 |
then it says this command, show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life. Okay. 00:39:54.580 |
Putting the two commands together. One live with knowledge to show her honor. Now in showing 00:40:03.380 |
an individual honor as what men should be doing, I think there's a difference between 00:40:09.020 |
just showing somebody respect as opposed to showing someone honor. Right? I think there's 00:40:15.060 |
a difference between just appreciating somebody versus showing someone honor. And I want us 00:40:20.740 |
to think about that for a little bit. You know, what would this idea of honoring look 00:40:25.100 |
like? Because truthfully speaking, we respect a lot of things, you know, for those of you 00:40:31.020 |
guys play basketball, you respect referees, you know, but you don't run over and be like, 00:40:36.380 |
well, bam flower, you know, you did such a good job. You respect, you know, the laws 00:40:42.860 |
of the land, but you don't stop at every speed light to just be like, bow. I honor you. You 00:40:47.340 |
know, we, there's a difference between just simply respecting and acknowledging something 00:40:51.460 |
that's there versus honoring. And you know, what's really crazy about this is the word 00:40:57.140 |
for honor to show her honor is actually the same word translated precious in chapter two, 00:41:04.420 |
verse seven. So earlier in chapter two, verse seven, he talked about this precious stone, 00:41:10.140 |
this precious stone to which to us is a huge advantage. And that word for precious is the 00:41:15.860 |
same word that he uses to honor. So if there is anything fragile we've ever owned, if there's 00:41:24.540 |
anything valuable, like a family heirloom, if there's something that we've moved, carried 00:41:29.020 |
up, carries an incredible amount of value, that's the way that we should treat the woman 00:41:34.420 |
that treat the wives. For those of you guys who are married, there is this question. And 00:41:39.300 |
I was really personally convicted by this. And as I was kind of thinking, and truthfully 00:41:44.620 |
speaking in the last, I don't know, I feel like dating back from last July, life has 00:41:50.420 |
been kind of crazy. There's just been so much going on. And in the last like month or two, 00:41:56.700 |
I've personally been sick and all this kind of happens. And then there's a sense to which, 00:42:02.940 |
yeah, like I communicate my love to my wife. But I have to follow up a second question 00:42:09.980 |
to that, which is, does she understand what I'm communicating? What I mean by that is 00:42:16.940 |
sometimes as a man, you communicate your love, but then you think you're done because you 00:42:22.540 |
just communicated whatever you needed to say. But then in this, when he talks about honoring 00:42:30.060 |
your wife, there's a sense to which is calling us to go above and beyond whatever we think 00:42:36.540 |
is just simply acceptable, to the degree where we can ask ourselves, does she understand 00:42:42.060 |
and get that on a human level, she is the most important, precious, valuable thing that 00:42:48.100 |
I have? That she has the honor and the affection of my heart. And the reason why I kind of 00:42:56.940 |
gave you my own personal kind of life example is because again, I think sometimes if let's 00:43:02.220 |
say I schedule in, "Hey, I'm busy. So on Tuesday, we're going to go out. Okay." I mean, you 00:43:08.780 |
guys know that's just not enough. What if I ever just said like, "Hey, we had Tuesday, 00:43:14.820 |
you know, a Tuesday date night, so I'm done." That don't make any sense. We need to be constantly 00:43:22.220 |
pursuing, honoring, and showing as precious who they are in our lives. So I make a challenge 00:43:30.900 |
that this passage, this call to the man, again, it's not just simply like, "Okay, guys, you 00:43:35.900 |
know, you know how women are and just be understanding, whatever." But there is this even higher calling 00:43:41.220 |
that in the heart condition, you're seeing her as something precious. And if she is then, 00:43:47.580 |
then all the various applications of what we said, seeking her best interest, taking 00:43:52.620 |
responsibility for the wellbeing. This is the kind of attitude that men should have. 00:43:57.500 |
And for those of you who aren't married yet, think about that. If you're an individual 00:44:03.660 |
who doesn't know how to respect first and foremost, and then to honor somebody, we need 00:44:09.140 |
to learn how to do that. Right? If you're a guy who's regularly given not to uplift, 00:44:16.420 |
like exhort and really affirm people, but rather you're always just making fun of people, 00:44:20.940 |
crashing them down and breaking them, because you think that's what, you know, cool guys 00:44:25.660 |
or whatever it may be do, we got to realize that's not showing what men need to be doing 00:44:31.780 |
and learn to do for the future. Okay. And what's more, I want to kind of wrap up with 00:44:38.820 |
this next two points right here. The passage talks about how, in terms of why we need to 00:44:46.460 |
be understanding, in terms of why we need to make sure that we're, you know, being careful 00:44:50.580 |
and see somebody as precious, is that this individual is someone weaker since she is 00:44:57.140 |
a woman. Right? I want to ask you this question. In what way is she weaker? Does this refer 00:45:04.260 |
to only physical weakness? And again, as I studied this passage, I kind of realized like, 00:45:10.220 |
maybe the common way that people looked at this, like, yeah, you know, she can't carry 00:45:13.780 |
as much. She can't carry as many bags in the, in the whatever. She can't carry the heavy 00:45:18.020 |
trash. I don't know. Maybe that's how some people might've thought. That's just physically 00:45:23.020 |
this individual happens to be weaker than men. But is that, is that what it's really 00:45:30.060 |
just talking about? Maybe just a physical weakness that one has? I would like to say 00:45:38.180 |
again, no, that is not necessarily what it's talking about. I want to kind of highlight 00:45:46.140 |
this thing. And I got this from the Baker commentary by Jobes. The author highlighted 00:45:52.320 |
the fact that the passage has a comparative word, weaker, not like this person is weak. 00:45:59.020 |
Okay. In comparison, there is a weakness, but what is this weakness? And this is the 00:46:06.380 |
case that I want to make. And it was important enough. I know we've kind of gone long already, 00:46:09.780 |
almost a full hour, but I just want to kind of put this in here. Okay. That what we need 00:46:15.020 |
to realize is there is a two kinds of strengths that people need to make sure that the husband 00:46:20.980 |
and wife role operate correctly. What do I mean by this two strengths? A man needs to 00:46:27.220 |
have a kind of strength where he's leading and he's not stumbled by fear because he's 00:46:32.860 |
so afraid he's going to mess up in his leading or he's going to mess up in X, Y, and Z. He's 00:46:37.140 |
not going to do a good job and his pride is going to get hurt. And he needs to have strength 00:46:42.140 |
to overcome that. Men have a lot of fear when it comes to performance anxiety. Like I need 00:46:47.300 |
to do this, this, this, this. And if it doesn't go well and I fail, then, uh, and they have 00:46:51.740 |
a big fear about that. But in terms of for the ladies, there is a strength that they 00:46:56.340 |
need where the role that God has called them to is one of vulnerability, right? In many 00:47:04.340 |
ways, women are placed into a role where they make themselves vulnerable because they're 00:47:08.700 |
making their, they've been asked to follow. They've been asked to submit by the call of 00:47:14.220 |
God, right? And this is where the passage is teaching men, you need to understand she's 00:47:20.580 |
not just physically weak. God has placed you in a role of vulnerability. Do not exploit 00:47:25.580 |
that. We're so in tune or that's typically like what we do with anything good and opportunity 00:47:32.700 |
we have. We exploit the opportunities we have to be selfish. So we exploit the opportunity 00:47:38.500 |
in our, in our liberty, liberty and Christian freedom and exploit that for selfishness, 00:47:43.820 |
grace and mercy, which we receive free. We exploit that for selfishness. But this passage 00:47:48.580 |
is saying, think otherwise. God has called the lady to a position that is more vulnerable 00:47:56.620 |
than you live with them with knowledge and understanding, see them as precious and honor 00:48:02.500 |
them. Right? So as I think about that, I don't think it's just, just a, um, a call for men 00:48:10.180 |
to understand, Oh, she's weaker physically. So make sure you carry the heavy stuff, right? 00:48:15.900 |
It's far more than that. It's far more than that. Now I want to conclude by saying, so 00:48:23.300 |
in all of this, a big challenge for us to think through the roles that God has given 00:48:28.380 |
us and how our hope in God is challenging us to fulfill these roles. But what's more, 00:48:35.620 |
he says at the very tail end of the exhortation to the husband, he says at the very end that, 00:48:42.180 |
you know, we need to show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life so that your prayers 00:48:47.620 |
may not be hindered. So the rationale for all this, why husbands need to do this, be 00:48:54.420 |
understanding, why wives need to submit, the rationale for all that is not so that you 00:48:59.140 |
would have a fine and dandy, peaceful home, right? The rationale for all that is not so 00:49:05.340 |
that you will have a, you know, a marriage life to envy where everybody's looking at 00:49:11.220 |
you like, wow, you know, the rationale behind that is your conscience before God. So you 00:49:16.940 |
can pray to him and you will notice that when you read the passage before and you read the 00:49:21.660 |
passes after that in terms of why we are doing what we're doing, taking on the call that 00:49:26.260 |
God has given us just so that one, we're seeking his good pleasure and two, that our consciousness 00:49:31.940 |
be clear before God, that there is an innocence between us and God and that when we can, when 00:49:38.060 |
we are in our relationship with the Lord, that there is a clarity, right? So everything 00:49:45.300 |
here is motivated by our relationship with our father, that before him, we have clarity 00:49:52.020 |
of conscience, okay? All right. I know that was kind of a long study. There's like much 00:49:57.700 |
to be said through that. Is there any questions or thoughts on that passage? Okay, well, let's 00:50:08.660 |
take some time to pray. Let's pray. Heavenly father, we want to pray and ask Lord that 00:50:25.260 |
when we hear the challenge of the scripture for us to do things that typically are not 00:50:31.660 |
natural to our flesh, when we're called to do things that really are at the standard 00:50:38.660 |
of God and Lord, maybe standards that we've accepted before are blown away and we realize 00:50:44.380 |
father God that what you expect is so much greater. I pray Lord that you grant to us 00:50:49.140 |
first just a commitment that with all effort, with all our hearts, we will try to follow 00:50:54.820 |
your way. And I ask God that you would continue to grant to us great faith so that we would 00:51:01.380 |
have the power to do so. Lord, I ask that as the family is truly so important and as 00:51:10.060 |
the relationship between husband and wife, who we are as men and women is so important 00:51:15.380 |
father God, I ask Lord that especially at our church, Lord, you would challenge us to 00:51:21.700 |
really fulfill what you have designed. We know father God that we're going to experience 00:51:27.900 |
conflict with the philosophy of the world. We know father God that oftentimes we're going 00:51:32.380 |
to experience just big hurdles because of the worldview in which we live, the surrounding 00:51:39.060 |
that we have. But again, I ask Lord that you grant to us just a heart of perseverance and 00:51:44.220 |
endurance Lord. Father, we thank you again in Christ name we pray. Amen.