Fees are important, and it's worth keeping an eye on, and you're right. When you go to 401(k) programs, and I think they've gotten better initially, they were horrible. The kinds of choices I'd see in plans that people would bring me, there was no index option at all. Now I tell people frequently these plans have scores of funds to choose from, which again in my world is kind of nonsensical.
Typically you'll have, if you have 401(k), you will be able to get a list of all the funds they have, and there should be a column on that list of the expense ratios, the ER. And what I tell people, especially who are not familiar with the different funds, the way you find the index funds is you put your finger on that column, and you start scrolling down looking for the lowest number.
And when you start seeing things that are like .05, .04, you've found the index funds. And then look at those, and you should be able to figure out, oh that's an S&P 500 fund, or that's a total stock market, if that's what you want.