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I Don’t Feel God’s Love — What Can I Do?


Chapters

0:0 Intro
0:58 What Can I Say
4:3 God Made Me Alive
5:29 Surprise Him
7:2 Psalm
8:32 Prayer

Transcript

(upbeat music) - Welcome back to the podcast. Today we look again at life when it's at its darkest. Christians often go through dark seasons and sometimes long dark seasons. Maybe that's you right now. Maybe this episode is providentially put into your life right now for a reason. This is the context for today's email from a young man named Joshua.

Joshua lives with his dad in California. Dear Pastor John, thank you for this podcast. Is there anything I can do to help God help my dad? We're not in the best living situation and although we've prayed, we haven't found a new place to live. I'm actively pursuing the Lord in my mornings and trying to lead my dad here, yet he still struggles with his faith.

Just last night he said that he doesn't feel God's love for him as a son. Life is hard for him right now and God feels distant to him. What can I say and how can I pray for a dad who does not feel God's love? Joshua, here's what I would want my son to do for me if I were in a dark place like your dad is right now.

And I could be there. I have been there. There's no Christian who doesn't experience seasons when God feels distant or when we don't feel his love as sweetly as we would like to. So first, I would want you, my son, to speak the truth to me about the objective reality of the love of God in the historical act of the death of his son.

Even though your dad does not now feel the preciousness of the love of God in giving his only son, he needs to hear it. Faith comes by hearing over and over, not just at the beginning. Make the connection for him between the love of God and the death of Jesus because that's the rock solid objective foundation of our feelings of being loved.

For example, Romans 5, 6 to 8, while we were still weak, at the right time, Christ died for the ungodly. For one will scarcely die for a righteous person, though perhaps for a good person, one would dare even to die, but God shows his love. He shows, he shows, he demonstrates his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Galatians 2, 20, the life I now live, I live by faith in the son of God who loved me and gave himself for me. First John 4, 10, in this is love, not that we love God, but that he loved us and sent his son to be the propitiation for our sins.

John 15, 13, greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. And that precious, present, tense word loves in Revelation 1, 5, he loves us, not loved as in most places, he loves us and has freed us from our sins by his blood.

That's what we need to hear. That's what I would need to hear and your dad needs to hear when our feelings don't correspond to reality. We need rock solid, objective, historical truth about the death of Jesus. Number two, if I were your dad, I would want to be reminded that the love of God for me was not only shown to me when Christ died, but also when he made me alive and gave me the mustard seed of faith that I'm struggling to hold on to.

Ephesians 2, 4, God being rich in mercy because of the great love with which he loved us made us alive together with Christ. If I have any life in me at all, small as it feels right now, it is owing to the great love of God for me in making me alive.

Number three, remind your father that when God made us his own by his great love, nothing can now separate us from him. Romans 8, 38. I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus, our Lord.

Number four, surprise him with a passage he may never have thought about. Micah 7, verses eight and nine. I love this passage. I've called it gutsy guilt. Rejoice not over me, O my enemy. When I fall, I shall rise. When I sit in darkness, the Lord will be a light to me.

I will bear the indignation of the Lord because I have sinned against him until he pleads my cause and executes judgment for me. He will bring me out to the light. I shall look upon his vindication. Wow. Even when we sin our way into darkness, the child of God can speak with boldness to the darkness and say, "Darkness, you will not have the last word." Even the God who put me here in discipline made darkness cover me.

He will bring me out. He will execute judgment for me, not against me. That's what I call gutsy guilt for the justified children of God. And then take your dad, fifth, to Psalm 139, seven to 12, and remind him that even when darkness covers us and wherever we go in our weariness and lack of feeling, God is there and he is our light.

Where shall I go from your spirit? Where shall I flee from your presence? If I ascend to heaven, you are there. If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there. If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me and your right hand shall hold me.

If I say, and this is so relevant for his dad, if I say, "Surely darkness shall cover me "and the light about me be night," even the darkness is not dark to you, O God. The night is bright as the day for darkness is as light with you. That's Psalm 139, seven to 12.

And then add this promise for a sweet application of that Psalm, namely Psalm 30, verse five, "Weeping may tarry for the night, "but joy comes with the morning." And finally, remind him that the apostle Paul knew that the struggle to feel the love of Christ would be part of the Christian warfare.

So he taught us how to pray about it. In Ephesians three, verses 18 and 19, "I pray that you may have strength to comprehend "with all the saints what is the breadth and length "and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ "that surpasses knowledge and be filled "with all the fullness of God." The amazing thing about that prayer is that Paul shows us that it takes strength to comprehend the love of Christ.

There is a kind of soul strength that God gives in answer to prayer, which enables us to grasp and feel and enjoy the love of God in Christ for us personally. So I pray, Joshua, that you will be filled with peace and joy and hope as you share these things with your father, and you can tell him that our little APJ band here is praying for him.

- Yeah, amen. Thank you, Pastor John, for always being willing to field questions on the podcast when it comes to the darkest seasons of life. Appreciate that. And if you want to ask Pastor John, and maybe you have other questions related to your own season of darkness, type out your question and email it to us at askpastorjohn@desiringgod.org.

Well, next week, we change gears to talk about books. How have books changed John Piper's life? And which books have changed John Piper's life? Those are our two questions, and they're both on the table next week, Monday and Thursday. I'm your host Tony Reinke. We'll see you back here on Monday.

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