And I do this little thing called a friends exercise that absolutely leverages the love of your friends. Find a friend who loves you and you love your friend. Do not do this with a sibling. Do not do this with a parent. Do not do this with one of your kids.

Those relationships are too close. Best friend, you want a best friend. And you ask them the simple question, why are we friends? And they're gonna look at you like you're insane because the part of the brain that controls our feelings, like love, doesn't control language. It's very hard to put our feelings into words, which is why we speak in metaphors and analogies when we're talking about our feelings.

And so they're gonna hem and haw and be like, I don't know. Well, of course they know, they just can't put it into words. And then interestingly, you stop asking the question, why? And you ask the question, what? Come on, what specifically is it about me that I know you would be there for me no matter what?

And they will start to try and describe you. I don't know, you're loyal, you're honest. You get that from a lot of people. That's just the definition of a friend. What specifically is about me that I know you'd be there for me no matter what? And they're gonna go through a few rounds of this and eventually they will give up and they will start describing themselves.

And this is what my friend said to me. Look, Simon, I don't know. All I know is, is I can sit in a room with you. I didn't even have to talk to you and I feel inspired. and I got goosebumps. In other words, that's when they tapped my why.