Welcome to radical personal finance a show dedicated to providing you with the knowledge skills insights and encouragement You need to live a rich and meaningful life now while building a plan for financial freedom in ten years or less My name is Joshua sheets today. I'm going to continue this series called my biggest financial mistakes my biggest financial mistakes again, I've Done a lot of introspection and analysis over the past six to twelve months in my own life, and I've made a list It's quite long of my personal biggest financial mistakes the things that have cost me more money than anything else and I've been sharing those with you little by little and in no particular order just in the order that I feel like I want to talk about them and today's Mistake is is actually quite simple.

It is simply this One of my biggest financial mistakes has been having a selfish focus on myself and my own lifestyle goals Rather than being willing to focus on serving others I Think here a little bit of background will help you to understand this. I Could have also titled this particular podcast Episode how I feel like I've been bamboozled by the financial independence movement Because it's taken me Quite a while to work through and experience enough to be sure of what I'm actually saying to you by way of background When I was younger I Wanted to be financially independent I wanted to be financially free and I spent time reading things and listening to people who promised financial freedom Who promised that I would be able to achieve my goals?

I read personal finance literature and personal finance literature taught me that if I would put money in my IRAs and contribute faithfully and invested into stocks that someday I would be a Wealthy millionaire and have a lot of money and then I would be able to retire I read and listened to literature and things that that people talked about that helped me to have that goal of financial independence and while I've personally made fun of and pilloried for many years the scam of retirement The reality is it affected me deeply The idea that even though I made fun of it right the Merrill Lynch ad with the gray-haired couple walking calmly down the beach I made fun of it.

I still it was still held in my mind as a vision something that I wanted and as I worked my way through the world of employment, I Systematically grew to want it more I started as a teenager Consuming mainstream personal finance books that talked about the value of retirement in your mid-60s Then I started working in Then I started working in Financial services in 2008 I joined a financial services company I started selling life insurance disability insurance long-term care insurance.

I got my securities license. I started selling investments Became a financial advisor and started doing comprehensive holistic financial planning at the time And when I was doing that I was working in a business model that was structured based upon that that mainstream understanding of retirement and so I of course had those goals one of the ways that the company that I worked for attracted me was by talking about their pension programs and I I knew people that Were very wealthy and had a great retirement Lifestyle, it seemed awesome.

It looked awesome And so I worked at that then along the way I became exposed to what is now known as the fire movement I found out that if I could save money More money then I could reach my goals even faster I Discovered the idea that I didn't have to wait until I was 65 to retire that I could retire perhaps 35 or 45 or 50 or 30 or 25 if I worked really hard and as I Discovered those concepts they became very very attractive to me and I started to work on those and I started to save and I started to really Invest myself into that approach and I've shared with you many of those ideas here at radical personal finance Along the way I discovered what I considered to be an even faster path.

The faster path was Entrepreneurship as I was working through my own financial independence planning I thought well, why should I wait and Wait to be a millionaire and just save and invest to become a millionaire when I could live a millionaire's lifestyle with the right kind of lifestyle business and I started building a lifestyle business now at the beginning it was radical personal finance it has since been radical personal finance, but I do some other things as well and my goal along the way was to build a lifestyle business and Originally my goal in building Said lifestyle business was six figures from a laptop All right because I thought what are all the things that I would do if I were financially independent and I created this vision this this goal of Kind of how I would live my life I engaged in these visioning exercises and I I thought it through and I became very clear on how I would live my life And I thought if I make six figures from a laptop with a very small Number of hours worked per week That would that would be great I never wanted to not work entirely That's that's that's never been a priority of mine, but I always wanted just to work a little bit, right?

Maybe not four hours a week But maybe 24 hours a week seems pretty ideal for me for 24 hour 20 hours 24 hours a week Four days a week six hours a day. However, you slice it right for years I've wanted to and plan done actually to a good degree I haven't done it purposefully but work three months on take a month off work three months on take a month off I've always been attracted by this Kind of 50% effort 50% lifestyle because it has seemed to me to promise all of the things that I have wanted You know the the personal goals of things like not having to set an alarm clock to wake up in the morning Being able to live wherever I want in the world not having a tremendous having tremendous time freedom I don't like to be constrained by a calendar where I have to be places at a certain time And so this these these at least we're all have always been the elements of kind of my dream life of how I would like to live Part of that has also been that I wanted minimal stress Having had employees in the past.

I determined I don't want to have employees. I don't want to have to Supervise people. I don't enjoy Supervising people. I don't enjoy managing Employees and I said, okay, I don't want that. And so I've I've over time I've made decisions I could have expanded and hired employees. I didn't want to do it.

I also didn't want the responsibility right when you take responsibility of Paying people money then when you run out of money It it hurts a lot more when you know that other families are Relying on you and on your work. It's a tremendous amount of pressure I've always been pretty capable and never worried too much about running out of money for myself because I've got lots of backup plans But then of course you have people working for you and you observe and you think it's gonna hurt them a lot worse than it Hurts me and it it's a big responsibility.

And so I said I don't want that and so I built a lifestyle business and I Told myself and I that it was awesome because it is it is right There's no there's no arguing that it's it's nice to have a lifestyle business it really is and I've told myself that that would be kind of the the ultimate that was as that was as big as as my It was as big as I could see right that was as big as I could see but what I have realized over the past year Especially is that that's always been a selfish goal.

It's always been about me It's always been about me and what has happened is when you have at least when I have when I have had as As I have a selfish me focused goal Then it makes me worry About making it too big some people don't worry about that But there are some people aren't affected by that, but I personally have have have often been Affected by that right?

Maybe you want to have a nice car Well, I look at it and I find it hard to justify why I should want the nicest car in the world right if what why if a if a If a car gets me down the road Then it's good enough But maybe I want a nicer car.

Well, how much of a nicer car do I want? Do I want a Toyota Corolla? Do I want a Lexus? Do I want a Tesla? Do I want a Ferrari or do I want a Bugatti right? There's a big difference between these vehicles and you look at it and you think well, I don't really Not really a Bugatti guy.

I don't I don't even fit in those most of those supercars. Although to be fair I haven't tested them all maybe there's one that's big enough for me And so you think that's not really me and then what's the goal is the goal to have one or is the goal to have?

A fleet is the goal to have 15 of them and some people have that that sense of ambition that sense of desire that that Endless lust for more more consumption, but I've never really had that partly due to my background partly due to my worldview partly due to my Looking at that and just consciously saying like this is stupid.

Why not be content? You know, why not have enough to Channel John Bogle right with enough or to channel the scriptures right godliness and contentment is great gain and so I've cultivated a sense of contentment. And so what I've told myself is Philosophically, all right if Joshua if you're content and then you have enough you have enough money I've never I've not found myself limited much by lack of money So you're doing fine And so you should just enjoy enjoy take your make your 24-hour work week and and go with it but That has resulted in my producing last that has resulted in my working less because I've often been under motivated to to To achieve more from my own ends So what's changed What has changed for me is I Have finally become willing to embrace a sense of responsibility Related to service and I have embraced on a deeper way than ever before the reality that I have a responsibility to serve I Have been given much and therefore much is required of me and I'm that much that is required of me For me to achieve that for me to do that.

It's not enough for me to just engage in Lifestyle business. It's not enough for me to engage in kind of hanging out hanging out and doing just enough and what a tragedy it would be for me if I wasted some of the most important years and God willing decades of my life hanging out Now it's taken a while for me to be willing to say that without hedging in a public way Because I have found the siren song of financial independence very attractive I found that siren song of of the beach lifestyle very attractive and I don't wish to condemn others for the decisions that they have made I I've said I don't I haven't quite gotten it for a number of years But I have often felt like I need to try it out Who am I to criticize someone else for the decisions they make if I haven't tried it out and the more that I have tried It out the more I have realized it's it's it's not for me.

It's not fulfilling. It's not I wish I could have learned this at an early age one of the jobs that I've had in my life that is just Taught me this lesson and gave me a good reference point when I was in high school I had a job working in an office for a friend of mine and He was giving a high school student a summer job and so he just basically brought me into the office and told his office manager here have Joshua work for you and the office manager Didn't quite know what to do with me.

She hadn't necessarily been looking for an employee she was just giving giving the boss's friend a Job, and so they kind of gave me some things to do but not a lot and at the time I could come into work every day and I was supposed to answer the phone But the phone very rarely rang and there were a few errands that I could run for them But they didn't really embrace the idea of teaching me a lot or training me a lot And so I've sat at the desk and I read novels all day every day.

I Love to read novels. I had great novels to read but I felt like I was useless. I felt like what's the point? why am I sitting here reading and I learned that just because something is fun doesn't mean that that's what you want to do all all the time doing something That's fun is great when it's a Break from the work and I've had other experiences that have shown that to me, but I think I was still Engaged with the idea that well, maybe it's just that I didn't have enough autonomy, right?

Maybe it was that with my summertime work Maybe it would have been fun if I hadn't had to stay in the office, right? maybe that maybe it was fun maybe reading novels would have been more fun if I could go to the cigar lounge every day and Smoke cigars and read my novels there from 10 a.m.

To 4 p.m And maybe it would be fun if I didn't have to worry about paying 15 bucks for a stick of tobacco Because I had so much money and I was actually financially independent and it would be fine and so I've I've had these lessons along the way thus my oft-stated discomfort with Many aspects of the financial independence movement, but I've often wondered maybe I just haven't experienced enough Maybe I just don't have enough money.

Maybe it's different if I had a couple million bucks Maybe it'd be different if I were in a different society a place that I liked more Maybe it would be different if I had a nicer house Maybe it would be different if my my personal hedonism were or more appropriate to me and the way that I want to live Well, I'm here to say that it's not and Pursuing lifestyle Has never been a Has not ever been fulfilling for me meaning pursuing lifestyle just well if I could just get a little bit have a little bit more money or have a little bit more freedom or have a little bit more a Little bit more Fun be in a more more beautiful place Then I'll be able to do it, but I don't find it.

I don't find it enjoyable I don't find it. I find it not fun and What it has become clear to me is Those activities those lifestyle pursuit activities are most rewarding When they are an interlude For your other moments of work and of contribution and of service An ice-cold drink is best after a long day's work And I've reached the point where That has become clear enough for me by philosophical introspection and by practical experience for me to be willing to reject building Lifestyle so-called lifestyle to the extent that it costs me service How does this relate to money why is this a financial mistake well because when I have pursued lifestyle I have always labored under the Constraint of what's enough?

All right, if you could live on $50,000 a year or a hundred thousand dollars a year. Well, then enough is 25 times your expenses and so two and a half million bucks in the bank. Boom You're good. Fifty thousand dollars a year two and a half million bucks in the bank.

You're financially independent 100,000, you know Fine, you're good four million So as I've I Get that math Totally messed up. You know what? I mean? I was alluding the 4% rule. Forgive me The math totally totally did not come out right there 25 times annual expenses so 50 100,000 a year You need two and a half million bucks The point is that you're always looking at it saying was just just enough right just enough so I need just enough and while I don't deny that contentment is a virtue that I wish to That I wish to appreciate I think that contentment can be seen can be something that keeps people from pursuing more and that the pursuit of more is Deeply gratifying That the pursuit of improvement is fundamentally an important part of the human condition I Still struggle to put this into words.

I've thought about this concept for Months and months and months and months and I don't know how to Express it more clearly. I've written it out for myself. I've thought it out. I've talked it out I'm doing it publicly, but if I were to put it into a concise statement I would simply say that There are some things in life that don't get old So, for example, can you experience Deeper connection with people that you love and care about I don't find that that gets old You can simultaneously enjoy What you're doing enjoy where you are while looking forward to experiencing more if you gather your good friends around your table and you share a great meal together full of amazing food and fun conversation and rich connection You come away from that time So thankful for the depths of relationship that you have enjoyed and the love that you have shared with one another Looking forward to the next time of being able to do more of that There are other things in life that are the same way you do a lot of it and You do more of it and it feels really good What I don't think is one of those things is Taking it easy or having a break or Goofing off or doing all the things that you want to do there are other things in life that are best in moderation and I guess what I have I Guess what has become very clear to me over the past few years Simply that if you pursue lifestyle That's what and and and that life and by lifestyle here.

I mean if you pursue Disengagement if you pursue I'm just gonna hang out It's not one of those things that can be done more of without damage It's rather one of those things that is wonderful in small doses Whereas service work you can do more you can serve more effectively you can work harder That's one of those things that is like love like relationships.

That's one of those things that can go deeper on So what does this mean practically? How am I correcting this particular thing? Well, I have made some changes that I'm becoming I'm willing to give up some of my personal freedom some of my lifestyle and A in order to work more and to be able to serve others more in various ways much of this related to business, but not all but I'm willing to Give up some of my freedoms and give up some of my indulgences in order to serve others more Part of this has to do with a recent travels.

I started traveling and for some reason it was kind of a mini retirement You'll notice I said was I have ended for now our Global tour. I ended it prematurely for the moment because of the coronavirus restrictions partly due to my not being able to get into some of the places that I'm very keen to get into at the moment partly Due to just the frustration of dealing with it.

There's nothing that'll break a father's heart Then seeing your children Subjected to invasive medical testing that is not fun and now if it's necessary you do it because you know, that's what's best for them, but I just So tired of seeing my two-year-old my four-year-old my six-year-old and my eight-year-old.

It's not such a big deal But just seeing them cry with having swabs stuck in their noses so we can get on an airplane It's brutal and I'm I don't want to do it anymore So part of his Kovan partly also is that Asia is still shut down I was planning to be in Asia this winter and the places that I want to go I can't get into and so I've ended our travels for now and I've rented a house back in the United States.

I've moved back to the United States I don't know that that will be forever But for now in order for me to serve people effectively, I can't be across the border. It's just too difficult I haven't been able to to do things that are important because of the the difficulties with the travel restrictions so I've rented a house in Florida and I'm in the process of moving my family back into that house.

And one of the things that I'm doing with it is I'm simply Committing myself to work To work now. I'll share with you. Honestly, what is You know what my experience is with that but what I mean by I'm committing myself to work is I'm giving up on The the freedom the I don't want to work too much.

I'm giving up on the I don't want employees I'm gonna hire employees. I'm going to take on that responsibility again. I'm gonna take on calendar appointments again I'm gonna do those things and because I don't want to Sorry to steal this from other people, but I don't want to die with my music still in me and I feel like the pursuit As I have pursued quote-unquote what I'm calling the financial independence lifestyle There's that that hasn't been What I have wanted And so I'm grateful that I have had the chance to try it out I'm one who likes to test things.

I'm one who likes to verify things I'm one who likes to know for my for myself is the pot actually hot I have one of my children is like this I see so much of me in him you'll tell him something and he just wants to see wants to find out for himself And so I'm grateful that I've had the good fortune to be able to try things for myself But I believe that there is more fulfillment in working Than there is in resting.

I believe that there is more fulfillment in service Than in being served. I believe that there is more fulfillment in a lifestyle that prioritizes Labor and growth and impact rather than a lifestyle that prioritizes rest and Relaxation and an inward focused selfish lifestyle and How does this apply financially well if you're going to work and if you're gonna serve then that means that You're gonna make a lot more money As long as you're not as long as you are working in an area where money is Where money is exchanged as a measurement of value?

My wife her work with my children is not measured in terms of value There are many professions and worthwhile sources of labor you might have an aged parent that you are caring for or an ailing relative that you're caring for and those Though that that hard work that labor is not going to be denominated in financial terms but Most areas of labor can effectively be denominated in financial time terms and the more people that you serve the more money that you make And so it's been good for me to experience the things that I have experienced I've enjoyed our little mini retirement over the past few months traveling the world and taking my children and doing cool things And having great adventures with them but I Want at this point?

I want more work and I want More service more labor more responsibility more impact Much more than I want more personal freedom more lifestyle, etc I've asked myself Well, Joshua, do you need to change things that you've said publicly? Are there any? Episodes of radical personal finance that you need to repudiate.

Is there anything that you need to adjust? The answer is I don't think so I Don't think that there's anything fundamentally flawed with The pursuit of financial independence. It doesn't have to be at odds with financial independence, you know financial independence versus versus work I don't think that Having personal freedom has to be at odds with saying well, I I I'm willing to give up personal freedom In fact for years I have said I believe that those who?

Those who You value the though the people who seem to have the strongest Point to say are those who? Know the opportunities that they're giving up. For example, let's think of a relationships, right? maybe I'm let's say that I come into a relationship and and I'm a very unattractive person.

Maybe I'm very obese and physically handicapped and just emotionally incompetent and I'm a jerk to all around me, etc And then by magic someday I find a woman who says, you know what? I'll accept you Joshua and is willing to go into a relationship with me And so we go ahead and get married How's she gonna feel knowing that she was the only one in the world who was willing to accept me and my brutish?

Personality and my ugly behavior and my boorish mannerisms, etc it'd be very different in terms of her confidence in my love for her if she knows that I'm Someone who was attractive physically attractive emotionally attractive kind had lots of options and Then I chose to enter into a relationship with her.

That's gonna put a very different feeling on you if you're chosen to do something versus if you're just the only person that says yes and So relating that kind of same level of thinking When people give up things people give up freedom then they can make a more focused decision as I've taught over the past year as my survive and thrive during the coming economic crisis course where I teach internationalization always said to make a plan That allows you to escape from a crisis does not mean that you have to leave during the crisis It's just simply to know that you have the choice to leave during the crisis and I think that a lot of us Will feel better about our decisions knowing that we're making those decisions voluntarily By choice rather than being forced into it.

That's that's how I feel is I don't regret Building additional layers of freedom for myself. I still appreciate freedom I desire to to engage in a free lifestyle in the future but if I choose to surrender Some aspect of my own personal freedom to gain something else that I want it makes me feel better doing that knowing that that's of my own choice and that I'm making a conscious decision rather than feeling like it's out of my out of my grasp and so I Don't think that there's any Fundamental disconnect between what I have shared And what I teach and what I've articulated in this particular Podcast for you for me.

It's more a matter of Am I willing to build a bigger business am I willing to hire employees am I willing to Chain myself down to some degree to one location. Am I willing to To do those things. Am I willing to work outside my house? Am I willing to commit to a calendar?

Am I willing to get on an airplane and travel for business more, etc? And As I'm willing to do that then of course that will result in a far higher income and that's something that in the past I Didn't want I didn't value I didn't feel it was necessary I didn't want it because I didn't want the corresponding losses of freedom but now I see that as I desire more service if My focus is on service.

It's going to require more work from me and I'm willing to do that. But then of course effective service Will be rewarded by far more financial gain So that's one of my mistakes I share that with you part of it's just a way of me telling you Some of the changes why am I quitting working?

Oh, I'm I quitting traveling right now It's not that I can't continue to travel. It's that I feel like I'm wasting my time. I feel like I'm wasting my precious time It's like okay. I've been traveling for months. I've done some work along the way, but it's like What's the point?

What's the point? Why just bounce from one place to another? I don't that's not I've gotten antsy and frustrated because the logistics of traveling harm the logistics of working and even As I've shared, you know a couple months ago I was doing a lot of traveling and I Booked a house in France for a month getting to be able to sit down and work Which is such a relief because it felt like okay, finally Finally I can get some work done and I just felt felt that and so what I'm doing now is a continuation of that Where I'm canceling the travels now At least on an ongoing basis setting up a household and there's this for me kind of an intense sense of Relief about doing that.

It's there's an intense sense of okay. Finally I can I can stop playing around I can get to work and it feels really good in my head to be willing to do that. I Encourage you if you are in the other side It's good to get a chance to to take a break, right if you're feeling like Josh I've been working non-stop for 10 years.

I appreciate that. I've served others I've worked and this has been great, but I need a break take a break. Take a sabbatical take a rest All right, give give yourself a rest if the land itself can benefit from being furloughed for a time Then you yourself May need a time of rest But then if you find that your rest period was enough don't be scared to get back to work That's where I'm at I'm ready to work.