This is a review of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu memes with Ryan Hall that we did after our podcast conversation. Memes are at once the lowest and the highest form of achievement by the collective intelligence of human civilization. I enjoy forcing brilliant people to be silly, hence this meme review. It's brought to you by Babbel, BetterHelp, and Raycon.

Please check out the sponsors in the description to get a discount and to support this channel. And now, here's Jiu-Jitsu Meme Review with Ryan Hall. Another ridiculous thing I have to ask, I printed out because I'm old school, some memes for you from Reddit. It'd be nice if you, what do I, go through 'em and maybe, what's your favorite number?

- 12. - Okay, so on a scale of one to 12, let's give a ranking to these ridiculous memes. - I support all of these, guys. Anyone with the mustache-io'd, like Fisticuffs guy is always funny. - So any meme that involves-- (laughs) - That guy's always, whatever's about to come next is usually pretty entertaining.

It's tough to give a rating without understanding the universe of other memes that exist here, but all right, I'll try to do my best. (laughs) - Yeah, yeah, you gotta make decisions. - All right, you're right, you're right. - So this is sobbing after adult class. - Sobbing after adult class.

I think, is that man holding on to a piece, biting a piece of soap? - That's actually, I don't know if you've seen, it's, what's that show? It's Tobias from-- - Oh, yeah. - Oh, you talking about Arrested Development? - I think it's Arrested Development, Tobias. That's what that looks like.

I don't know. Maybe it's not. - Yeah, it's funny. All right, I'll give it a four. (laughs) - Wow, that's not good. - No, maybe four's really high, who knows? - It could be. You're a tough grader. - You move so well, practice. It must be an innate gift, a gift from God.

It's practice. I'll never understand how some people are so talented. A mystery, practice. That one hits relatively close to home. - That's one of those deep philosophical ones as opposed to funny. - Yeah, it's not funny, it's just accurate. - Yeah, it's accurate. - Yeah, exactly. - So would you give good scores for accuracy?

- I'm here for the jokes. - Okay. - All right, so I'll give it a four also. - Do you get this, by the way? This kind of experience? - What's that? - Where a lot of people are like, "Well, Ryan Hall is just talented." - Well, I think, I mean, like, maybe I just don't think that I'm very talented, you know?

So I mean, I just do nothing but martial arts all day, every day, and have done nothing but that. - I mean, do you believe anybody can get good? - No. - Essentially? - Oh yeah, it depends. I think if there's the only talent that I think I have is discipline and grit.

- That's interesting. That could be genetic or whatever. - I think that's a real thing. But you can't convince me to quit. But a friend of mine, someone said, like, "If I can talk you out of your dream, "you don't want your dream." And I think that's true. And where people go, "Oh my, someone so discouraged me." I'm like, "I hear what you're saying, "but if you really, really wanna do any X, Y, or Z, "you will decide to do it." And I firmly believe that.

And again, whether that's true or not, it falls under the category of facilitative belief. And that will probably make you a little bit more, you know, more of a go-getter in certain regards. So I guess, yeah. But I don't think I'm particularly talented. I just care a lot. Okay, oh yes, he's employing a sumo geisha landing into a kiss of salami hold.

Anybody, Judo guy opening his book of terminology. I think they could actually expand that to modern jujitsu guy who now tries to use Japanese words for all sorts of stuff. - What's the arm lock in that? I don't even, I'm a Judo person. - Jujigatami? - Jujigatami. Do you use like Japanese terms for techniques?

- Not when I'm speaking to English speakers. - What do you think about like Eddie Bravo just renaming every technique? - I mean, that's weird to me too. - That's the full range of them. - Yeah, exactly. There's the two ends of the spectrum and you gotta find what's right for you.

You know, you've got-- - What do you call an arm lock? - An arm lock. - Okay. - Yeah, you know the one? Yeah, come on, man. No, not that one, the other one. - Yeah, yeah. - All right. But yeah, it's, again, I think that there's a lot of people gotta do what's right for you, but there's also, I struggle with the branding going on that I see in jujitsu.

That's not something I'm super stoked about and not, you know, but again, if it helps you remember, then right on. - One to 12, what does this ridiculous meme get? - Oh, again, disturbingly accurate. I'll say six. - So you're giving props to the accurate. All right. I mean, these memes are horrible.

Like, Redd needs to do better. - Yeah, this one needs to be better. The best defense against a body triangle is to get really fat that is a strong defense. Let's all agree with that. I'll give that one a two. - I think I only pick memes that get like several hundred and a half votes.

So these, at least Redditors thought they're of value. - Figured this would be the best way to get rid of coronavirus. - Put a blue belt on that. - I like that one. - Oh, okay. - What do you get? - I was about to say that went over my head.

- 'Cause everybody quits after they get a blue belt. - Yeah, yeah, I'm an idiot. (laughing) I was like, why is teaching martial arts gonna help? - So you get, 'cause you don't get it, what that's like an undefined score. - I'll give it a 12. - I think it's an explanation.

- It's way smarter than that. - John, what do you give that one? You got a 12. - I'll say a 10. - I'll give it, I would give that one a 10, I think. Yeah, I like that one. - After two hours of hard sparring, you look good.

After 10 minutes of cardio, you look good. - Yeah, you look like that. That's a... - No, that's you. (laughing) - I think it's the reverse. - Well, I would have to do cardio in order to understand that. - Yeah, have you ever done cardio? - Again, it goes well over my head.

I ran once. - You, what, for a bus? - Running breeds cowardice. I don't wanna do it, but yeah. (laughing) Don't wanna get too involved, but yeah. - So yeah, so maybe you can review this later once you actually try cardio. - Exactly. - Yeah. - All right. When you get submitted 46 times, but none of the submissions are IBJJF legal.

- I, I mean, yeah. - I gotta say, I gotta say that. Gonna give that a two. - Okay, all right. I thought you were going to the negatives, but it's good. - Yeah, about to say, was that appropriate? Negative two. I was trying to be charitable. All right, me who got promoted during COVID waiting to actually roll in my new belt.

- People thought these were funny? - Yeah. (laughing) - I'll take that as a one. - Yeah, I'll take that as a one. All right, how 90% of BJJ instructionals. This one also hits close to home. I gotta give it a six for the accuracy. - Okay, guys, that's, I can't, I do the same thing.

- By the way, I think you're the next, you're instructional is in the next meme. So just so you know. - Are they really? Oh man, okay, I don't want to look at it yet. I'm sure they're saying something funny about me that's entirely accurate. So 90%, let's give that a six.

- So this is like an old school meme where you insert anything overly expensive. - Overly expensive during an economic crisis. Food, data, rent, half-guard DVDs, utility, 150, someone who's good at the economy, please help me budget this. My family is dying. All right, I'm gonna give that an 11.

Out on a scale of 12. - The comment is like, spend less on half-guard DVDs. - No, yeah, no. I like it, that's solid. All right, what the guy who murders you on the mat looks like outside the, that's absolutely accurate. If you guys have ever met Paul Schreiner, you'd know exactly what's going on.

Dude, I still remember my first day at Jiu-Jitsu, and this is where Jiu-Jitsu became like the coolest thing in the universe to me, was there was a guy named Eric Ryerson, nice guy, he was at Ronin Athletics in New York, this was 2004, and he was a white belt.

He was probably 130 pounds soaking wet, and he was a white belt. And again, he didn't hold a banner for tough guy, certainly not at that time, but you know, like, I'll try to fight you. And just getting absolutely mollywopped by this guy, and then going, holy crap, this is literally the coolest thing I've ever experienced in my life, this is like magic.

And it's not even like, oh, this guy's a black belt something or other, and he's been at it for X time. How long you been training for? I don't know, like eight months, I'm like, you have all my money. Like, you're never gonna get rid of me. And yeah.

- That's a magic moment, when you realize that the technique matters, it's fascinating. - Yeah, well, he basically, I'm sure he wrote, if the bird scooter had existed at the time, Eric would have transported himself to the gym, and to and from the gym on that, so I'm gonna give that also an 11.

- Stache too. - The stache. He didn't have the stache, but I don't think that was in at the time. - Yeah, it wasn't essential. - Yeah, when your teammate is losing the match, but you promised you would record the whole thing. Eh, I'm gonna give that a one.

- I like the old school digital camera. - Yeah, that is true, I remember that, that actually. - That was a thing before smartphones. - Did you ever kick your ass so bad, you drive the speed limit home with no music playing? - Yes, absolutely. - How often have you, have you felt that recently?

I remember feeling that often, I usually would take the bus home, and I would just sit there, no music, no podcast, it was just this sad feeling, overcoming your body, life is meaningless. - I remember when I first met Marillo Santana, like it was yesterday, it was the winter, 'cause he has family that lives in the DC area, and we had our school in Arlington, and Marillo has a beard out to here, and he's wearing a Fidel Castro looking hat, and I'd never met him, he was in ADCC, and this was right after ADCC 2009, so this was December 2009, and it's snowing, and he's standing outside the gym, I'm like, "Who the hell's that?" And I walk up, I'm like, "Hey man, can I help you?" He's like, "Hey, got a trade with you?" I'm like, "Are you Marillo Santana?" "Yeah." I'm like, "All right." And he comes upstairs, and super polite, nice guy, and anyway, so I'd done the 66 kilos, and he did 77.

He says, "Hey, you wanna roll?" I'm like, "Yeah." And Marillo's had the world's deepest voice since he was a child, and I believe he had a beard when he came out of the womb, but anyway, we're training, and I'm like, "All right, not that good, but I'd done ADCC that year, "I got third, I'd beaten some good guys, "had a really close match with Leo Vieira "that I got screwed in, thank you, referees at ADCC." That was decent at the time, at least, and you get the feeling where I'm like, I can't fully understand what's going on here, but I feel like I'm being let off the hook.

I'm like, "I'm not escaping this." I'm like, "Hey man, you can beat me up." You know, he's like, "Oh, I'm trying." I'm like, "No, come on." He's like, "All right, we're gonna try a little harder." And he's not being like, he's just being nice. I remember I had like a thousand yard stare at the wall at home that night forever, 'cause it wasn't like, "Oh, people can't beat me up." There were plenty of people who'd beat me up, particularly at that time, but it's like, I think he passed my guard like 35 times.

And that was something that wasn't happening, like for the most part. And I'm like, "It's you to rest." Oh, he's a little bigger. Yeah, that wasn't the problem. It was a skill thing, and just going like, "What was that?" And it wasn't like, "Oh, I get to play. "We're gonna both train and he's gonna win." I'm like, "We're not training.

"I'm just getting like chucked around like a four-year-old. "I don't know any jiu-jitsu. "I need to reevaluate my entire life." Murillo is a fantastic instructor and trainer in addition to being a great competitor and runs Unity Jiu-Jitsu in New York City. I feel lucky to have trained with many of the very, very best guys in the world, but man, Murillo's as good as anyone I've ever met, as good as anyone I've ever met.

Absolutely fantastic. Just a fantastic knowledge of jiu-jitsu. And I watched it, I remember just training periodically over time, over time, over time. I would get better, the gap would stay the same. And it was pretty cool and it was inspiring. It really taught me a lot. It's the only way you get better, right?

So yes, I know exactly about. So this- I watched other people do the same thing. We would train and like, I don't wanna use them. People that everybody would know. We would sit in the back of my like beater Honda Civic that I had at that time and watch them stare out the window like this.

(laughing) Yeah. And just like, "Yep, been there, buddy." (laughing) Like a tear slowly- Oh yeah, exactly, exactly. Just the one. (laughing) Yeah, okay. So this is another one of those memes that's just entirely accurate. Yeah, so I'll give that an 11. All right. All right, guy watching UFC. I don't get all this ground stuff.

I wish I knew an expert who could explain it to me. Two stripe white belt. Yeah, that's also accurate. Little less funny, but I don't know enough about SpongeBob SquarePants to be able to like understand what that expression means. Yeah, but- 'Cause usually it would involve like, you know, like Roger Gracie standing right there and I'm like, "Easy, Roger, I got this." Yeah, yeah.

And I'm like, "Step in front of him." True, true. Yeah, there's a- I'll give that a seven. That's a seven. That's a strong place to end. I feel that way. (laughing) Right, thanks for putting up with the ridiculous requests. No, thank you so much. On meme review. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music)